Disneystuck [TEXT]

**mysticCharlatan** · 06-10-2012, 10:51 PM

In the Land of Frost and Ruin sits a golden tower draped in red tapestries. Several clues indicate that the tower was not built there, such as the fact that it is distinctly different in architecture from the surrounding snow covered castles and fortresses. Or the fact that it is lying in a small crater on its side. Perhaps the fact that it was not there an hour ago would tip someone off.

Regardless, the tower sits in a place other than its original location. Within is a young man that stands out almost as much as the tower itself. He is obviously not dressed for winter conditions, instead wearing clothing more in keeping with a desert dweller. He doesn't seem to mind though. In fact, sitting there and staring at what is now the floor of the sideways room, he doesn't seem to notice much of anything.

>Be the Despondent Youth

You can't believe how badly things have gone. How horribly you screwed up.

Beside you, a lamp begins to vibrate. After a moment, a mist came out of the lamp's opening and forms into a screen. It's your lamp-top. You thought that was terribly clever when you first came up with it. Now you just think it's stupid.

Another one of your friends is pestering you. You wish they would just leave you alone. Most of them are. They figured it out about half an hour ago. The ones that didn't you blocked. But you can't seem to do that for her. So you've just been ignoring it. But you can't keep doing that forever.

There. You've finally done it. You've pushed away your oldest friend.

You can no longer be the Dispondent Youth, because even the Dispondent Youth doesn't want to be him anymore.

>Be the Dispondent Youth in the past.

You are now a youth, but you don't know about the dispondent part. Sitting in this dilapidated attic with a great view, you can't really think of a reason to be dispondent.

You are a thirteen year old boy in the city of Agribah, probably one of the wealthiest cities in the Middle East. Which is great if you are one of the wealthiest people in the Middle East. Unfortunately, you are DIRT POOR, owning little more than the clothes on your back. You don't even own the place you live. You just crash here for as long as you can before the OLD MAN who lives here kicks you out. It's hard, being poor and homeless. It's hard and blah blah you're not bothering to finish that.

Seriously, you're not much for whining about your circumstances. You'd rather be out there having fun than slaving away at some meaningless job to earn just enough to sustain yourself. You might like to live in the lap of luxury, given the chance, but you do have to say that claiming what you need through skill and cleverness seems a lot more satisfying than having everything handed to you.

What would such an upbeat lad be named?

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**Xindaris** · 06-11-2012, 11:48 PM

>Gottaeattolive Gottastealtoeat Tellyouallaboutitwhenigotthetime

**mysticCharlatan** · 06-12-2012, 08:46 AM

>Gottaeattolive Gottastealtoeat Tellyouallaboutitwhenigotthetime

What? No. That's just gibberish. You try saying that as fast as you can and hold on. Not only did you do it, but that has a nice rhythm to it. Maybe you'll talk to one of you musical friends about putting that into a song.

But anyway, that's still not your name.

You are ALADDIN, and as it has been said before, you are a POOR, HOMELESS KID. Some would go so far as to refer to you as STREET RAT or RIFF RAFF, but you don't buy that. You are currently standing in the attic of OLD MAN CASSIM, marvelling once again at just how big a hole the PARANOID NUT can leave in his security system. I mean, you'd think he'd notice that HUGE HOLE in the attic, even if you've taken to covering it with stuff to hide it.

What do you do?

**Xindaris** · 06-12-2012, 11:11 AM

>Find a tiny pet monkey to confide in.

**mysticCharlatan** · 06-12-2012, 10:30 PM

>Find a tiny pet monkey to confide in.

You already have one of those! Well, at least the monkey part. You're not so sure about the pet part. Pet implies ownership, and you consider ABU to be one of your closest friends. You couldn't possibly own him.

Unfortunately, Abu is currently out scouting for a sucker generous shopkeeper who will supply you with dinner tonight, so he is not available for the confiding stuff. Fortunately, you have a few human friends for that! You retrieve you CONFISCATED LAPTOP from behind a life sized statue of an OLDER AMERICAN COMEDIAN who's name you can remember right now. Robert something? No that's not quite right. You wonder why Cassim stockpiles stupid stuff like that. Just in this attic alone, there's the AFORMENTIONED STATUE, a veritable treasure trove of OLD LAMPS, some possibly valuable CARPETS rolled up in the corner, and a BRONZE STAFF shaped to look like a snake. You already tried hawking the thing, it's worthless. But man does it creep you out. Staring at you like that.

You put the creepy snake-staff out of your mind and open up your laptop to see which of your chums is currently online. Looks like ionicWindsurfer is on, but that's not surprising as he usual leaves his computer on and logged in for hours at a time. It's really hit and miss for when you could catch him. simianMonarch's on as well, but he's... special. You like talking with him about Abu, sometime you even let Abu "talk" to him and he has fun playing along with that, but other times he just seems plain weird.

And that seems to be about it. Darn, you were really hoping to talk with HG about the game you were going to be playing today, or maybe rp a bit with CF. Oh well. You suppose you could take your chances and try pestering one of these two. Or you could call it a loss and find something else to do.

**Huntress** · 06-15-2012, 11:28 PM

The crossover I never knew I wanted. +1 reader

I feel like making Homestuck style sprites and hero mode pictures of the characters mentioned here so far. Perhaps I'll do that later. For now:

> Pester IW. If he doesn't respond, try SM instead.

**mysticCharlatan** · 06-16-2012, 11:31 AM

>Aladdin: Pester IW.

Well, might as well take a shot in the dark.

Well that was fun. What now?

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**mysticCharlatan** · 06-20-2012, 02:14 AM

==>

You almost close your laptop when suddenly another chat window opens. Looks like somebody is Mr. Popular today!

Pesterlog:

Well that was weird. Come to think of it, a lot of your friends online are weird. You wonder for a second whether you are in fact some sort of weirdness magnet. You wait for a moment for something crazy, like an entire parade in your honor to begin marching through the streets, but it fails to occur. Well, maybe next time.

Anyway, you check your list of chums. Neither monstrousPhenotype or hermeticalTrichologist are on right now. You know that both have something of a complicated home life (something you've never had to deal with, one of the benefits of not having a home) which results in a very limited amount of time online for both of them. You could very easily miss them entirely if you leave, but you also have to go pick up Cassim's your copy of the game. Thankfully, this latest version of Pesterchum has a new feature that notifies you when someone comes online. This feature is still in its beta stage right now, so it can only be applied to one chum at a time. So you must ask yourself, who would you rather deal with: MP and his self-worth issues, or HT and her paranoia?

**Xindaris** · 06-20-2012, 09:38 AM

>Paranoia. Anyone who habitually steals things should be able to relate to being constantly cautious of something bad happening (i.e., getting caught).

**Huntress** · 06-20-2012, 03:51 PM

...username monstrousPhenotype, has self-worth issues.

Well, if my hunch is right, I'm gonna have a hell of a time making a sprite of him. >w>

Anyway. Seconding Xin's command. o:

**mysticCharlatan** · 06-21-2012, 11:10 PM

>Aladdin: Deal with paranoia.

You can't really do that yet, seeing as she's not on. But you decide to tag HT so that you will be notified when she's online. You ponder what exactly you could do to convince her to play, but fail to come up with anything. You suppose you will just wing it when the time comes.

Well, that's out of the way. You look out the hole in the attic to see if Abu might be on his way back. Unfortunately, the rooftops are lacking any tiny monkeys. Well, with dinner not forthcoming and the day slowly but surely coming to an end, you suppose it is about time to get your hands on a copy of Sburb. So it looks like you will once again have to risk life and limb to venture into the main living areas of Cassim's place. You suppose you should make some sort of preparations before blindly charging downstairs.

--------

**mysticCharlatan** · 06-23-2012, 06:21 PM

==>

It hasn't been that long since you've infiltrated the below-attic areas, Cassim couldn't have set up many new security measures. You decide to make sure you have just the essentials and then move out.

You captalogue your laptop with your STREETRAT MODUS. There's not really much special about this modus except for one minor, slightly aggravating feature: it has a tendancy to eject anything you put in it at random intervals, like pockets with holes in them except a lot more inconvenient and with a few more head injuries. But you don't have the resources to gain a new modus, and you can't maintain full mobility while lugging around your laptop, so you'll just have to risk it.

You also ensure that you have your STRIFE SPECIBUS sorted out, just in case things go wrong. Yep, there it is, your DISTINCTLY UNMAGICAL CARPET.

Yes, you have the CARPETKIND strife specibus, what of it. You were like, seven when you set it, you found a rug you didn't want to loose through your stupid modus, and you thought you might be able to change it later.

You get over ranting at yourself and decide to have one last look out of the makeshift window in case Abu is on his way. You do not see him, but decide to enjoy your view of the city for a moment.

The sun is nearly set over the city of Agrabah, and a few stars are even now starting to appear. The noises of calling shopkeepers and bustling streets full of citizens are still present, but are steadily dying as everyone starts heading home. Anyway, they weren't as loud today as they usually are. The greater than average temperature has forced many inside, which is saying something considering you are in the Middle East. Even now, as the sun sets and the city should start becoming cooler, the warmth of the day radiates from the street and makes you sweat. You wonder if the greater than average heat has anything to do with the star that was not where it was two minutes ago. A comet? Meteorite? You don't know the proper term, and frankly you don't care. Space is far enough away; you really only have to worry about here and now.

Your gaze drops back to the city, and is drawn to the largest building in it, easily visible from your viewpoint. It is a palace compared to your borrowed hovel here, and as you look at it you feel pang of jealousy. Despite the sentiments you share with IW and HG, you have always had a little part of you that resented and envied those brought up in the lap of luxury, or even in a home of their own. You have lived on the street for as long as you can remember, always struggling to survive every day. You wonder what it would be like to have a home, a family of your own, with possessions and wisdom that would someday be passed down to you. You wonder if that would be nice. You don't know what a normal kid's life is like, not really. Heck, you don't even know when your birthday is.

Maybe it's today? That might be nice. Spending your birthday playing a new game with old friends. If that isn't normal, then you don't know what is.

Happy birthday, Aladdin. May the next year be better to you than the thirteen that have preceeded it.

For some reason, despite the fact that it is practically over, you get the feeling that this just might be a long day.

--------

**Xindaris** · 06-23-2012, 09:07 PM

Hm, you missed something normally in the usual melodramatic intro. I have a suggestion:
>"Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."
>You are pretty sure Samuel L. Jackson said that.

>Cassim: Sudden attack time!

**mysticCharlatan** · 06-25-2012, 11:13 PM

>"Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."
>You are pretty sure Samuel L. Jackson said that.

Yes. Yes you are.

>Cassim: Sudden attack time!

You know that dropping down from the regular exit for the attic would result in your detection almost immediately. Thankfully, while being a loon with more security measures than the pentagon, Cassim also has a fondness for SECRET PASSAGEWAYS and you know there is no way he can keep track of all of them.

You enter one that you believe connects the attic with the FIRST FLOOR WASHROOM. You really don't know how it does that without going through the TWO FLOORS in between, but it does. You wiggle the door open with some effort as this particular secret passage has remained unused for quite a while. You enter the small room and perform the secret sequence to activate the lift (close the door gently, knock twice, turn 180 degrees, stomp twice with your right foot, kick the wall with your left) and feel a bit of satisfaction when you detect a downward motion. As you open the door again you think to yourself that there's nothing that can stop you nOH MAN CASSIM'S RIGHT THERE!

You stand entirely still for a moment. Maybe, just maybe...

Yep, you were right. This is one of CASSIM'S SECURITY DUMMIES. He dresses them all like himself, with that blue cloak that covers his face, and positions them all around the house in random locations. Normally motionless, if you inadvertently activate them they will deliver a very non-fatal but very painful assault. You'd rather not have to deal with this if you don't have to.

The problem is, what is the mode of activation for this model? It was facing you when you opened the door, otherwise expertly hidden in the back of the shower, so it can't be motion sensitive. It could be sound activated, so you probably shouldn't make too much of a racket. Not that you were going to anyway, but still. You also know that this particular room is set up with both PRESSURE PLATES and INVISIBLE LASER SENSORS, of which only one can be active at any given time. It could be hooked up to one of those systems. But which one?

You know that none of Cassim's security measures in this room are present in the shower, so you step out, careful to close the door behind you quietly. The shower is fairly big, such that you can't quite touch the opposite walls at once with your outstretched arms. Within it are one BAR OF SOAP, one LOOFAH, a few FINE BATH SALTS, two bottles each of SHAMPOO and CONDITIONER, and one SHOWER CAP. The bathroom beyond has a BLACK AND WHITE PATTERNED FLOOR, whose complex patterns of pressure plates you are fairly familiar with and could avoid with tip-toes and a few jumps. Unfortunately, the LASERS that may or may not be active in this room are far to closely spaced to even attempt to go between like in those heist movies. However, the lasers do leave a gap on the floor that you could crawl through if you take it carefully enough. So if you try and avoid the pressure plates and are wrong you will activate the lasers, and vice-versa. And if you activate either, then apart from the dummy possibly coming to life and beating the living daylights out of you, an alarm will sound alerting any inhabitants of the house (ie: CASSIM) to your presence.

Sometimes you think that Cassim might be setting these security measures up to challenge your intellect, but that's just stupid.

The bathroom itself is simple, with a SINK on the COUNTER to the left, with LIQUID SOAP, TOOTH PASTE, five TOOTHBRUSHES, and one of those MIRROR-CABINET COMBO DEALIES. To the right is a rack with one SLIGHTLY DAMP TOWEL hanging from it and a HALF FULL LAUNDRY BASKET. The door that exits into the hall is directly across from the shower.

**mysticCharlatan** · 06-30-2012, 10:19 AM

==>

As you sit and ponder this conundrum, your Streetrat Modus appears to be fed up with waiting. It randomly ejects your laptop, unfortunately right into your head. You resist the urge to shout out in pain and manage to catch the darn thing before it ricochets out of the shower.

Rubbing the sore spot on your head, you are glad that both your skull and the laptop are QUITE DURABLE. You decide to open up you laptop and see if perhaps someone else is on. You find a good number of folks online, but no one who you are particularly in the mood to talk to.

You can see that at the root of this increased activity online are HG and AL. You have surmised that they are currently campaigning for everyone to play/not play Sburb, respectively. HG has already recruited you, however, and it seems that AL is leaving you alone for the time being, for which you are thankful. For once, IL is actually offline. Maybe his captain is really threatening to throw him overboard. You scan the other names on your contact list, careful not to open up the list of blocked names; some of those folks were so annoying that you'd rather not even look at their chumhandle if it's all the same.

Apart from IL, a few of your friends are still offline. You wonder what they could be up to.

crystalineFashionista
eccentricBibliophile
hermeticalTrichologist
metamorphisedCulinarian
monstrousPhenotype
simianMonarch

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**Xindaris** · 06-30-2012, 06:16 PM

>Be sM;
>Aladdin: Make it through this trap completely off-screen, without ever revealing how you figured out which of the traps were activated and how you got through it, and/or waiting to do so for a very long time from the players' perspective.

**mysticCharlatan** · 07-02-2012, 01:17 AM

>Be sM.

You are now the kid with the second name simianMonarch. It is the name that you use on the magic device you use to talk with your far-away friends. They seem like strange gorillas, but that is all right, because you are a strange gorilla as well. Maybe that's why they are far away, because the other gorillas didn't want to be around them?

You suddenly feel very happy that you are accepted by your family despite your oddness.

You are currently hanging from the topmost branch of a tree which features the biggest (and strangest) nest you've ever seen. It seems to be composed of wood, but it isn't part of the tree, which confused you for a long time until you stopped worrying about it. So what if the nest is odd and mysterious? You like odd and mysterious. It reminds you that you aren't alone in being odd and mysterious.

You take a deep breath of the afternoon air and let out a call. You've been working on your own call, but you haven't gotten it quite down yet. So you decide to do a leopard call for now. You can do leopard pretty good.

What would such a wild and free lad be called?

**Xindaris** · 07-02-2012, 11:00 AM

>Tarzan Hrjplx (*Error: Surname only pronounceable in gorilla language)

>Leopard: Promptly respond to call.

**mysticCharlatan** · 07-02-2012, 06:19 PM

>Tarzan Hrjplx

Look, it's very easy to pronounce. You don't know why it gives your far-away friends so much trouble. You can say it just fine, and you're probably weirder than all of them put together!

You are TARZAN, whose last name shall remain unspoken because I really have no idea how to say it. You are still hanging above the large wooden nest, wearing a simple piece of leather around your waist. You have no idea why you are inclined to do so, none of the other gorillas need to cover themselves. Then again, all of the other gorillas have actual fur in places other than the top of their head. Oddly, you don't feel increadibly driven to cover the rest of your body, just the bit below your waist.

Yeah, we've pretty well established that you are a strange gorilla.

>Leopard: Promptly respond to call.

There is a crash and a snarl from below you, inside the nest. It would appear Sabor is nearby, and was alerted by your call. Normally, you'd just let the cat crash around and leave, but right now he's inside the nest where you keep your magic items, so you probably should deal with him.

**Xindaris** · 07-02-2012, 08:11 PM

Sora: crash through the roof
>Crude Spear his face in!
>Or if you forgot your handy spear..wrestle?

**Huntress** · 07-05-2012, 02:35 AM

Wasn't Sabor female?

> She responded to your call, see if you can talk to her in a way she understands and promptly begin to insult her if you succeed

**Xindaris** · 07-05-2012, 10:36 PM

Hm, yep. Didn't know that. In fact, from a Disney wiki that a quick google search led me to:

Little known fact: Although Sabor's gender is never revealed in the film, the original Sabor in the Tarzan novels was female. In fact, Sabor was a name for all lionesses (Numa being the name for the male lions). In the Disney movie, Sabor was made into a leopard because lions don´t actually live in the jungle. (Leopards are also the main and only natural predators to gorillas). Although Sabor's species was changed, it is logic to assume that she is still a female in the Disney film. Sabor is a feline villain, much like Shere Khan and Scar. But unlike the first two, Sabor doesn't talk and shows no sentience.

**mysticCharlatan** · 07-09-2012, 12:36 AM

>Tarzan: See if you can talk to her.

You know, in all the time you've dealt with Sabor, you've never tried talking it out? Maybe that's all that's necessary. You can speak at least passable Leopard, after all.

You swing your way down to the nest and enter through one of the smaller openings. As you suspected, there's Sabor, generally making a mess of things. Thankfully, he hasn't found your stash of gifts from your far away friends, but you don't want to take any chances. You try and open up a respectful dialogue with your admitedly limited command of Leopard.

Dialog:

Sabor growls a reply to quickly for you to catch all of it. You did catch the word for "female", as well as another word you will not repeat.

Oh dear. You probably just insulted him... er, her. Sabor growls menacingly. You doubt that it is simply a warning.

>Tarzan: Crude spear his her face in!

You retrieve your POINTED-ROCK-TIED-TO-A-STICK TOOL from one of magic leaves that your far away friend AL sent you. You do so just in time, blocking Sabor's jaws from closing around your throat with the stick portion. You push the large cat away and bring the pointed rock part to bear. You make some threatening motions, but Sabor seems to be less than intimidated. You suppose there's nothing to do but get into a FIGHT!

Huh. For some reason that doesn't sound right. You get the feeling that you should be using a word that starts with the "Ess" sound.

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**mysticCharlatan** · 07-17-2012, 10:53 PM

==>

The fight is intense, but doesn't last particularly long. You are disarmed at one point, but this does little to stop you; you simply rush forward and begin to grapple with Sabor. The two of you have met on many previous occasions, and therefor the fight almost seems to fall into a routine.

Eventually the two of you separate, and after a moment of stillness, Sabor bolts out of the nest. He, no wait, she hasn't admitted defeat, simply acknowledged that prolonging this encounter will offer no benefit to anyone, least of all herself.

Now that you are more certain of the safety of the nest which you long ago claimed, you begin to wander about. You pick up your weapon and return in to its magical leaf. You eyes wander over the strange place, the draping webs so tightly woven that they are opaque, the strange dead wood arranged in ways that even you can tell aren't naturally occuring, and perhaps most eye catching, the rotating sphere, larger than any melon or fruit, covered in blue and green and brown and white.

Finally you come the the place where you have hidden your collection of magical devices sent to you by your far-away friends. The wooden container has another tightly woven web on top of it, which you quickly remove. You always feel a certain warmness, a certain safety radiating from this structure, which is why you've hidden your most valuable treasures here. Which of them should you examine first?

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**Xindaris** · 07-19-2012, 10:12 AM

>Rotating sphere!

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