Re: Sweet Jade and Hella John: "Wait When Did This Turn Into Jerry Springer"
everyon who will give birth on this ship wuld then sudenly have there kids in good/evil twin pairs
don ask me how she casted the spell
i think quimby helped her or somethig
oh yeah and another survivor was beetty crocker (and pranking harlequin taking him on a date) which is how she had the same spell
but um thats it
after all that jerry springer shit as kanaya called it SD got serious and killed RC
she kicked him off the ship
and wached him get impaled on a ice thingy
(this trip took place by where itr was COLD)
a few months later after rose and roxy were born SD aslo poisoned GH, wile she was on her cruise out to the middle of the ocean, to get her monies making DO want to plot revenge aganst them
as you can see her hand is there cuz only showing the arm is cool art technique
oh yeah and jake and i were born a few days ago
SD and AD sort of part ways a littel after thuis
SD gave jake and i to dick to raise
DO had to take care of rose and roxy by himself
and KC had to raise dave and dirk by herself
so theats how we each only have one gardian
and thats the story of how we were bron!!!!!
it was rumored that the bodys of reddy mccoolshades and grand highbuck were stolen by sum vampires or something
but of course, there is no proof
(FOR THOZ CONFUSED, THIS IS WHAT'S IN RIP'S COFFIN AT THE END OF EOIA3)
RW: Say hi to your dad Dave!!!!!!!!
RW: It's a family reunion here!!!!!!!!
DS: oh my god really?
DS: rip thats a new low
DS: and you used to be a nazi so thats saying something
RW: Oh? It's low if I happen to stumble upon your dad's corpse?
RW: It's lower than when the Millennium were planning to kill every man in Europe?
DS: im saying showing someone the reanimated corpse of their own father is kind of fucking inconsiderate
DS: and doesnt taking dead bodies break the law against like DONT TOUCH DEAD PEOPLE?
RW: That's the beutiful part.
RW: You see, the cruise ship slightly went a little off course during Ms. Harley's invasion.
RW: Both the one that led to the death of your dad, and the one that led to the death of Lalonde's mom.
RW: It wasn't technically in the territory of any country.
RW: So anything went!!!!!!!!
DS: ok im seriously gonna need backup for this...
Last edited by Great Pikmin Fan; 08-14-2012 at 10:40 PM.
Reason: Doing the changes so that it's like the next post.
Re: Sweet Jade and Hella John: Sparta kick onto an iceberg.
From here on out, I'm putting the update inside of the spoilers, and any authors notes outside. And like with the commands, I might go back and one-page-a-day transfer the others this way. Because seriously, there are way too many images on here.
So yesterday was the first day since I begun this adventure that I didn't update this, but there's a reason behind that. One of the computers in my family's house had gotten a really bad virus, and my mom thought it was part of the modum at first, so it was left unplugged in efforts to "starve" the virus of sorts, leaving me without internet to update this, since I waited too long.
To make up for it, tomorrow (not today because I don't think I'll have enough time) will have ten panels instead of the now-usual five.
Welp, it was a good streak of about six and a half months. 1-26-2012 to 8-11-2012.
[I] Past Dream DS: Use Temporal Replicsimile again.
You do the move in a way Pickle Inspector did not: Your past self splits, showing off fanmade time travel clones colored in cyan (Past Past Dream DS) and magenta (Future Past Dream DS).
[I] This is getting kind of confusing...
That one demon-Jade we saw in Red Hell earlier tells you all to not take this too seriously. There may have been a period sometime back around Intermission Act Two or Intermission Act Three where you were supposed to, but that has long since passed and I have decided not to go in that exact direction anymore.
But she says that since you've been putting up with this for this long, she'll give you a quick little recap:
There is still only one Rose and Roxy. They are in the Chinese Restaraunt close by the end of World 8-4; the final battle is right in front of them. And yes, this means that the Mario Intermission is close to ending. There is also only one Dirk (surprisingly) unless you count the Auto Responder. Dirk is with team Chinese Restaraunt too, and is currently still shocked about that incident when Joan kissed him. AR isn't really a physical person, but the shades accosiated with him are stuck on that one little rock sticking out in the pit that the gang went down.
John, Jade, Jane, and Jake all have one counterpart created in the inward journey: John's is Jean, Jade's is Jude, Jane's is Joan, and Jake's is Jaka. This technically means that there are two of each of them (except John; we'll get to that), even though they now go by different names. Before this, John had a one-up misunderstanding resulting in the creation of another him. This other him would then eat a fire flower, becoming FIRE John. So there are three Johns. All nine of these kids are in the restaraunt too.
As usual, the trolls don't really have much going for them. There is currently only one of them each, with one exception. Aradia, Tavros, Elitaa, Karkat, Kanaya, Terezi, Vriska, Equius, Gamzee, Eridan, and Feferi, through shenanigans, have all eventually ended up with the group of kids in the restaraunt. Sollux and Meenah are in the former's hive, Meenah arguing about the meeting she was pretty much forced to go into. The other trolls who were A1 trolls in canon (plus Elitaa's counterpart, Puerco) are just coming home from a meeting hosted by Aranea, talking about trying to kill Rip. We've only seen Aranea and Meenah as of now, the others not yet being seen due to not yet being revealed in Homestuck yet. Puerco, on the other hand, hasn't been seen yet because I'm a lazy artist.
The exception to the "one copy of each troll" statement is Nepeta, the most "impurrtant" character in Sweet Jade and Hella John. Through an ectobiological stable time loop, FIRE John helped create twelve clones of her; one with each of the blood colors in the hemospectrum, excluding her own but including Karkat's mutation. They were more-or-less split into groups but these groups have been coming together recently. Bright Red, Dark Red, Orange, Yellow, Teal, Azure, Blue, Indigo, and Purple Nepeta are all with Team Chinese Food. Green (the "original" Nepeta) was last seen through a monitor, in some kind of cave which may or may not be the same cave that the majority of Team Chinese Food went into earlier. Chartreuse, Jade, and Tyrian Nepetas remain unseen, though the latter has had a trollian conversation with Eridan earlier into the story.
And here's where things get messy: Dave. There is currently one real him and four to six dream hims. For the following reasons:
Yesterday (which took place on the 13th of Febuary, 2012), Dave went to sleep to conjure a dreamself to help him deal with some fangirls. Upon seeing a whopping nine people trying to message him at once, the dreamself installed pesterchum on itself and split into three to answer them.
One of the three dream daves used Temporal Replicsimile, splitting into two more copies: A green one that went into the past and became Past Dream DS, and a red one that went into the future and became Future Dream DS. Past Dream DS appeared in Sollux's hive and spent the majority of the 13th and the 14th there, but he has recently ended up by the house in 7-2, where Rip is. He has even more recently split yet again, becoming the cyan Past Past Dream DS and the magenta Future Past Dream DS. Meanwhile, Future Dream DS went to 8-3's inn, tried to keep Jane and Jake from following John and Jade, and resorted to splitting again into the blue Past Future Dream DS and the yellow Future Future Dream DS. Past Future Dream DS took Future Dream DS's place and would later go to Sollux's hive to replace Past Dream DS, while Future Future Dream DS has yet to appear.
Another of the dream Daves went to a dinner with his fan/hatebase, but that was on the 13th. It's the 14th now, so he could be anywhere or even dead. Same applies for the last non-temporally-displaced Dream DS, who was last seen kissing Rose in the park. Again, that was on the 13th. Hense the "four to six;" we don't know if the non-time-travelers are dead as of this point. The real Dave is still presumably in his house.
PAST PAST DREAM DAVE appears in the second half of WORLD 5-2. TUBALCAIN "DANDY" "CARD GUY" "NUCHACHO" ALHAMBRA is trying to revive CLEVELAND BROWN.
It seems the author forgot that this person wore a BROWN suit, not a WHITE one. Wow, what an uncarring artist!
DS: yo millennium dude
DS: you know about rip right
CB: Yay Im back!
DS: why are you reviving him?
DS: i thought you two were
DS: you know
DS: sworn enemies
CB: Were togeter now.
CB: In a relationshop.
DS: so what is cleveland joining the millennium or is alhambra joining the fox crew?
TA: I'm becoming the Fox Crew!!!
DS: cuz the millennium should know that rip is planning a pretty big mutiny
DS: the fox crew are already after her
DS: but if we can get the millennium against her
CB: Sorry bu he's on my side as much as TARDIS is on Dr Who side.
TA: YOU LIKE THAT SHOW???
TA: im sorry, but we cannot relationship!!!
Alhambra kills Brown.
TA: I'M JOINING THE MILLENIUM AGAIN!!!
TA: STATUES QUO IS GOD!!!
DS: so um
DS: look man rip showed me something kind of traumatising
DS: shes also planning on mindlessly taking over world 8
DS: and then earth
DS: but you know world 8 does have a high resource value
DS: so shed be messing up your plans and stuff
DS: please just spread the word to anyone
DS: you just trust me like that?
TA: Can you telekinetic blast me to are base at 8-4???
DS: setting up a war base in the middle of a game some kids are playing is kind of wierd but okay
EDIT: When it comes to Dave, the "next" heading for logs isn't used.
EDIT2: Forgot to mention Nepeta in the who's where page. How could I forget the most impurrtant character in SJAHJ?
Last edited by Great Pikmin Fan; 08-14-2012 at 11:02 PM.
Re: Sweet Jade and Hella John: "This is getting kind of confusing..."
[I] Past Past Dream DS: Conjure MOTHERFUCKING PROSPIT for TA's ride.
You do, draining your dream meter completely and causing you to fade. Your memory will go back into Dave after some time, (from a chronological perspective, this won't happen for a few hours, since dreamselfs are synched up with the real selfs even after time traveling.) and you KNOW he won't like the news that Rip has the bodies of his father.
-- ERTH HEAD [EH] began pestering cardGuy [CG] at 3:00 am --
EH: Yo Card Guy.
CG: Yellow hydra head.
EH: Janider told me you were off the Mulennium now.
CG: O i'm bak on and i killed cleveland agan.
CG: And im about to gfet a lift to are base at 8-4.
CG: My lift is this bigass planet thing.
CG: Canj you come here and push it or something???
EH: Wate first............
EH: How longago was it that you killed him?
CG: Not long ago.
EH: You haz bottles????????????
EH: bottel Clevelands gost.
-- EH ceased TA --
[I] TA: Start fyre and bottel spirit.
Hydra comes in, teleporting thru fire. He will then push you to 8-4 with the GREEN HEAD's gas breth. But thats for latter now. Let's focuis on John and Jade. We haven't been doing that recently. (NO THE ANCESTORS DOESN'T REALLY COUNT SINCE THAT WAS FOCUSED ON THE ANCESTORS.)
[I] Team Chinese Food: Reelize Roxy's not in the restrant anymore.
ME: WERE IS ROXY?
ME: NOW WE DON'T HAVE A NUMBER DIVISID BY 4!!!!
ME: now wat will happen?
LH: uh oh your rite john
LH: i think we will soon dumpling paradox
THE CHIONESES FOOD DOESN'T HAVE THE RIGHT MULTIPLE OF PEOIPLE TO EAT IT SO IT DUMPLING PARADOXES INTO A BLACK HOLE!!!!!
[I] MEENWILE, OUTSIDE...
Roxy's tocking with The Evil
RL: do you have some of that quest gatordade? TE: Yep.
TE: Why do want it?
TE: You going to make a dude of yourself?
RL: um yea sure lets go with that
Everyone runs out.
RL: hi guys
RL: DONT MIND ME I NOT TRY DOING ANYTHING BAD RITE NOW OR ANYTHING!!!!!
RL: im NOT trying to forse a ship or something
NL: ::::8 < hold on....
NL: ::::8 < i think there is something wong with roxy
NL: ::::8 < 8ased on how much shes shipping
NL: ::::8 < so yu guys said she ships a lot normaly?
ME: well now it looks like she's up to no good.
ME: i DO don't think she WULD normally deel with a badguy like trhis.
NL: ::::8 < hrm........
Ceruleanpeta punches Roxy in teh gut. She spits out someWORM thingy.
LH: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?
NL: :1 < OH TH1S
NL: :1 < TH1S 1S A SH1PP1NG WORM
NL: :1 < 1TS L1KE A PARAS1TE THAT WAS OR1G1NLLY NAT1VE TO ALTERN1A
NL: :1 < S1MPTOMS ARE 1T TAKES PEEPOLS SH1PP1NG OP1N1ONS AND EXAGERATES THEM
NL: :1 < AS THE 1NFECTEE GETS CLOSER TO DETH, THEY GET MORE EXAGERATES AS THEY START TO LOSE THERE M1ND
NL: :1 < THESE TH1NGS PERFER MORE RAB1D SH1PPERS SO THEY HAVE MORE TO FEED ON
NL: :1 < L1KE US
NL: :1 < THRU EXPER1ENCE WE ARE REELY GOOD AT DEEL1NG W1TH THEM
RL: jedus i almost died?
RL: AND I HAD THAT FUCKING THING INSIDE MY INTESTANTS???
RL: oh god oh god imma throw up :C
NL: :6 < you can thank us for sav1ng you
NL: :6 < the nepeta leagon to the rescue!
LH: so what we do with the worm?
NL: :V < what else?
NL: :V < step on it
SHIPPINGWORM: Aw hell naw.
Re: Sweet Jade and Hella John: The dreaded SHIPPING WORM
[S][I] MME, FLH: STRIFE with The Evil
(Also da suns starting to set now)
Sorry for no musik. hahaha that was classical prank.,
The Evil escapes your fite at LOW LOW HBELTH and gets towards the blackhole. Also SHipping Worm was to the black hole too.
TE: Ill make a deel.
TE: Jump into this black hole.
TE: I can use majicks to transform us and shit.
SHIPPINGWORM: Hell yeah if it meens I don't get stepped on.
They fuse into it with the BlackHole power plus The Evil's magic.
THE SHIPBLACKHOLEEVIL has been formed!
TE: MINNIONS, COME!
IT'S A BOSS RUSH!!! ALL 7 OF THE WOLD BOSSESS ARE THERE TOO!!!!!!
(Howie Mondell is boss of World 1 asnd Marselinee is boss of World 6 The other bosses for those that forgot are:" Stone thing for W2, Lurkker Shark for W3, Jack for W4, Mini for W5, and Cryistal King for W7)
-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologict [EB] at 1:40 pm --
TG: have you read the update yet
TG: i can see you now my future future dream self is really close to you
TG: i think you should read the update
TG: also those other versions of you over there should read it too
TG: that girl version and that version in a different colored outfit
TG: come on
TG: trust me
TG: i know youll like that new plot twist i put
EB: did yo kill off another person??
EB: cuz every update has been kills, kills, more kills.
TG: im not gonna tell
TG: read it yourself
Fun fact: The fight against The Evil was supposed to be in an actual flash, among other things happening... but I don't have Flash.
EDIT: Changing just ME and LH to MME and FLH for John and Jade because I forgot when making the command heading for the strife that I used those terms since IA3 to tell from them and their counterparts.
Last edited by Great Pikmin Fan; 08-17-2012 at 03:57 PM.
You can handle the plot twist that Earth can't be saved. In fact, you even like it now. Strider killing off countless mermaids was FINE since your waifu is still alive. Jossing your theories about LORD E-BROTHER even tho he hasn't been revealed yet (remembre Coolstuck takes place in a equivilent to Ect 5 Act 2 of Homestuck) was a neet twist. The SHIP TEASING had been annoying you because of how much they bfucking mentioned romance but you kept reading. The ship SINKING was good for you since you don't care about relationships, but you didn't like how one reel big bomb copies your catchphrase "I am not a homosexual" but that's still good.
Of all the 3 humen players, wy you gotta kill off Geromy? Why Strider? Why? Why? WHY?????
A transformation starts to both of you.
You slip into the fabled reddeath trance of the raegnerds, quaking all the while in the hotbloodanger throes of the whiner tongues. You advice your teammates not to be alarmed, as they crconikal the event in tomes bound in the Mexican flesh of two tortured hellsingers, with runes stroked in the steaming tears bled from the flippingout-weary eyes of fifty thousand imaginary Coolstuck fanatics.
But they fail not to be alarmed.
LH: duuuuude wtf is goin on with you 2?
This is because, as is now painfully obvious to anyone with a brain, you have basically gone completely off the deep end in every possible way.
You have officially been PISSED THE FUCK OFF.
Also yu grow twice the size but it's not noticable here.
LH: yo john and jean snap the fuck out of it its just a stupid comic
LH: yeah the humens arent as good as the mermaids anywya WE: John... could you clam down...?
WE: Yes John pleese listen to your sister!
ΓH: Dam dawg peepol ragequit coolstuck every day!
ΓH: Yes strider is a pretty big troll if you ask me!
KV: NORMALLY I'D TELL JAKA THAT THAT'S RACIST BUT DAMN JOHN AND JEAN YOU MAKE ME LOOK LIOKE MY BROTHER!
AM: guys pleese calm down OnO
TN: dUDE,,, jUST,,,,, dAM,,
ES: Jane are your brother and antisexclonebiological sister aree always liek thiS WE: Not always.
KM: Hurr Durr
TP: *G4SP* SO MUCH C4NDYU R3D!!!! <33333333
VS: See Tavros, I wish you were more like THESE guys!!!!!!!!
EZ: D --> Dam i was wrong
EZ: D --> Humans can be stronger then trolls
EZ: D --> Well then agan...
EZ: D --> Gamzee your thoughts?
GM: ArAdIa Im ScArEd. :O(
EA: howw the hell do there clothes not break?
EA: i meen jeans tits shulda busted right outta there if she got bigger like that
RL: I guess it goes to sho that Dave is the master at manipukating emotions.
RL: i no rite? hes so dreemy....
RL: Hrm, what happened to "Only Jade for Dave?"
RL: fuck bitch everyone loves dave
RL: also i was half possessed and half infected for the last part of today
[I] FIRE ME: React to update.
You're reely not that interested in that comic anymore for some reason. This reason would be elaborated ona little more if the author had actually given you some character deleopment to tell you apart from John instead of making you some background prop. Hopfully sum more development will occur soon.
[I] DS: Pull a Duncan from Total Drama and unexpectedly come out of nowhere to hog up the spotlight yet again. Also, pull a Duncan in that you ignite a really shitty, overdone love n-drangle debate shortly after your appearance.
You cannot command normal Dave! He's still in his house! Which is outside of the Mario session!
You can, however, command his Future Future Dreamself, which is right there on 8-4 with those other guys.
TP: W3LL W3LL W3LL 1F 1T 1SNT 4 DR34M D4V3
TP: WHY DONT TYOU UNBLOCK M3????
DS: who are you
TP: R3M3MB3R??? TH4T G1RL YOU BLOCK3D??
DS: i block lots of girls
DS: and boys
DS: god i have no idea what i was thinking when i displayed my chumhandle for everyone to see in public
TP: 1M T3R3Z1 PYROP3
TP: DONT YOU D4R3 FORG3T TH4T N4M3
DS: im sorry but i see lots of names
TP: 1M G4LLOWSC4L1BR4TOR
DS: oh fuck all kinds of duck
I now understand why characters of Homestuck are separated so often: it's easier to focus on individual characters when going to one perspective forces you to deal with a group limited at around 1 to 5. There's 32 protagonistic people here, 33 counting the dream Dave that just arrived. Many of these people here may be Nepetas, but it's still kind of hard to find a good escuse as to have, say, Eridan get some role in the story.
Last edited by Great Pikmin Fan; 08-16-2012 at 10:26 PM.
Re: Sweet Jade and Hella John: Going Grimpiss. Or... Pissdark?
Blah blah blah editted mirror first. God, I really need to manage this more.
DS: well okay fine you got me
DS: what do you want an autograph?
TP: T3LL M3 WH3R3 YOURS3LF 1N P3RSON 1S
KV: O NO YOU DON'T.
DS: you thought i was actually gonna tell her where i lived
KV: I SEE U HITTING ON TEREZI.
KV: DON'T HIT ON TROLLS.
KV: OR ELSE.
RL: Hold on thats just frendship.
FP: Yea)( i no w)(at )(ow Terexzi )(its on peepol cuz s)(e does it wit)( me a lot.
KV: TEREZI YOU GOTTA STOP OBSESSING OVER THIS GUY.
TP: BUT K4RK4TM4T3 3V3RYON3 LOV3S D4V3!
FP: True dat. Terezi and I can s)(are t)(at c)(oise guy if we can.
FP: Say Dave w)(at you t)(ink of polygamy?
ΓH: Can i waigh in on this?
ΓH: It sickens me karkat that you treet a lady of such a fine haff blue blood hue with such disrespect!
LH: i thot your fetish was blue blooded trolls
LH: like equiuses color
ΓH: We vary.
FP: I agree with Jaka!
KV: ALSO DON'T CALL ME "KARKATMATE."
KV: IT REMINDS ME OF PUERCO.
KV: WHO SCARES ME.
LH: yo guys can we stop tocking aboiut troll/humen bestiality and get back to johns flipout at daves update?
Thees assholes punch away the world bossess and they fall off tower.
That's about it.
But there still PISSED THE FUCK OFF so yeah.
[I] Green NL: Where da fuq are you we haven't seen you sense IA3 man.
Your talking to Jade's biological mum.
NL: :33 < gimme those chaos emeralds
SD: Look kid, Strider and Highbuck were my two top kills.
SD: And then that bitch Rip stole their corpses from me.
SD: She may have two of those chaos emeralds but I have THREE.
NL: :33 < well then
NL: :33 < i mus get them the hard way
SD: And what's that, Leijon?
NL: :33 < SEPULCHITUDE!!!!
SD: With all due respect, are you on crack?
Aw come on! What hapened tyo Neepta being the spotlight hog hoo was behind everything!
This is unseptable! The Nepetas don't want Dave messing up there plans! Especially the higher blooded ones....
[I] Tyrian NL: Troll Dave.
-- arcenicCatnip began trolling turntechGodhead [TG] at 1:45 pm --
AC: >:I < ok so the other nepetas told me about your dreemself shIt
TG: oh mother of fuck
TG: not you
TG: this conversation is over
AC: >:I < YOU WANT TO FUCKING LISSEN TO US H9IGHER BLOODED NEPETAS FOR ONCVE YOU RASIST TWAT BECUZ THIS IS IMPORETANT!
AC: >:I < look
AC: >:I < Im just sIttIng here by the quantum scatterer
AC: >:I < reddy to just...
AC: >:I < SEND SOMETHING TO THAT SHITTY ABANDOM LAB BY ROSES HOUSE
AC: >:I < look your gonna send prospIt here rIte?
AC: >:I < Im gonna make SHURE that SOMEHOW, SOMETHING falls from that planet of yours and lands thru the scatterer!
AC: > D:< AND THEN CRUSHED ALL OF THOSE TROLLS YOU HOLD THERE
AC: > D:< AND UIT WILL BE YOUR FAULT THAT THEY ALL DIE!
TG: woah jesus
TG: talk with your ectobiological half-sisters over this
TG: i dont mean to sound racist but prefferably one of them with a lower blood color
TG: you need to chill
TG: probably eat some fish
TG: that always calms down john
TG: i mean this is fucking murder youre planning
AC: >:I < but its legal to kIll lower bloods on alternIa
AC: >:I < and meenahs not there anymore so I wont be kIllIng my own caste
AC: >:I < PLUS IM THE HIGHEST FUCKING BLOOD SO EVERYONE SHUT UP AND BOW DOWN TO YOURS FUTURE EMPRESS! THE ECTOBIOLOGICAL GRANDAUGHTER OF THE MOTHERFUCKING CONDENSE
TG: but the condesce isnt in the rule anymore
DS: darkleer is and hes something of a racist fuck but this isnt alternia anyway
AC: >:I < IF I CAN FIND ARE FORMER EMPRESS I CAN GET ALL OF YOU ASSHOLES WIPED OUT AT THE POINT OF MY FINGER!!
TG: youre stressing out
TG: youre not thinking straight
TG: talk to the other nepetas
AC: > DX< JUST GO FUCK YOURSELF!
TG: you know that due to my dreamself shinanegans that is possible
AC: >:I < thIs shuldnt be the tIme to even crack jokes lIke that!!1
-- AC ceases trolling TG --
Meenwile, FIRE John notices the arrow thingy.
FIRE ME: hay wait a minite!
[I] ERROR: NO COMMAND ARROW.
FIRE ME: so these arrows are supposed to be of me, jade, jane, and jalke...
FIRE ME: and then they grow for the counterparts...
FIRE ME: WHY AM I NOT INCLUDED?
[I] FIRE ME: Discuss this with GPF in a shitty fourth wall break.
FIRE ME: pikmin fan, why am i not includedd as the command arrow?
GPF: Um... the thought didn't come to me at the time, so I just... went with that old plan?
FIRE ME: o ok then.
FIRE ME: i thot you were being a dick to me.
FIRE ME: so pleese add a dash to represent me?
GPF: Yeah, sure thing.
GPF: How the hell did you get in here, anyway?
FIRE ME: jade showed me.
GPF: That actually just raises more questions than it answers....
FIRE ME: ok there was a portal gun thing. see up there?
FIRE ME: happy now?
GPF: Yeah, I guess.
EQ: HAY! YOu THERE! HuMEN IN THE RED AND WHITE!
FIRE ME: welp. i don't like nthe sound of that guy.
FIRE ME: i'm getting outta here then.
The Nepetas are supposed to be glaring/angry in the first panel but it's kind of hard to see.
Next update will focus on The Evil again. And it will be kind of important.
KM: DAM I Must Be Smocking Sum Reely Fucked Up Weed Man
KM: Its That KIingdom For Dave Striders DComic
LH: your not smoking i see it too
It turned out the Nepetas have been steeling the jetpax of progres.
They JETPAC the peoples to to Prospit by carrying everyone.
O rite I almoss forgot this asshole was RIDING porspit there too.
Mn fuck this millennium shit i wanna write about KIDS.
TA: You know abot teh Rip Van Winkle???
TA: She's evil and planning up to no good. [UNSURPRISING DEVELOPMINT]
LH: yea well u no i dont give a shit about rip anymore
ΓH: Woah wait i do!
ΓH: This wonan is suposed to be like a sexy woman hitler?
LH: grr rip!!!
LH: MILLENNIUM I VILL KILL YOU ASSHOLES!!!!!!!
TA: UM WAITE!!!
TA: I haz sum IMPORTANT INFO on your QUEST TO FITE THE EVIL!!!
FIRE ME: where the hell did prospit come from?
TA: Dave did it.
TA: He conjured it with dreamself.
FIRE ME: DAYMM!
TA: You see this is my last stop.
TA: Within 8-4 there is a bilding we millennium made that acts as are base.
TA: We have are own personal rooms and shit.
TA: Look I need to tell as many millenniums as possible to no that Rip's evil.
TA: Then she'll be less of a threat cuz she's kicked off rthe teem so she won't betrays us as easily.
Tubalcan Alhambra doez a SUPER VAMPIRE JUMP (hes a vampire BTW incase you dont know) from prospit to the millennium headquarters in 8-4 which is rite underneath The Evil's lair. All while The Evil keeps miles and the miles become towards Prospit.
Oh look, it's WALTER. (Also i finally drew a full body for him but it looks black because he's dressed in all black like with Zorin.)
He was shot by Jake several hours ago, but while this may be CASE, he's still standing. Parshaally cuz he got himself some bandaids.
TA: Yo Walter the Rip is evil!!!
TA: Spred the word!!!
WD: Yea dude i know we're all evil......
TA: No i meen like she ca betray us.
TA: Also the fuck shot you up???
WD: Those kids Jane Egbert and Jake Harley.
WD: Well technically it was only Jake but Jane was an accomplis.
WD: He also shot my radio.
WD: So I need to borrow yours if I ever wanna message the rest of the Millennium anytime soon.
TA: Dude just tell Quimby.
TA: He'll send the message to everyone.
-- betrayingButtler [BB] began pestering LORD MAJOR QUIMBY [LMQ] at 1:45 pm --
BB: Yo boss.
BB: RIP'S PLANNING ON BETRAYING US GUYS!!!!!!
-- LMQ ceased pestering BB --
HH: SURPRISE MOTEHRFUCKER!
7/17 BADGUYS KILED
1/17 BADGUYS IS A FAMILIAR TO ANOTHER (that's the purple shit on Cartman)
Hank survives becuz his glasses sheeld the blast.
But hold up. We're gonna back up in ANOTHER flashback to show how Hank got there from the Yellow Ship and where the Yellow Ship is. (dont worry its not long.)
-- arsenicCatnip [AC] began trolling turntechGodhead [TG] at 1:47 pm --
AC: :I < heres a better Idea
AC: :I < Instead of usIng prosIt...
AC: :I < I USE THAT PEESE OF WORLD 8-4'S CASSEL THATS FELLING DOWN FROM ASPLOSION!
AC: :I < ohh and If my calculatIons r correct,
AC: :I < It wIll land on/In the qwuantum scatterer, so It wIll be sent tthru It to my destInatIon, the good twIn trolls!
AC: :D < and then I get to kIll them and hold YOU as responsIble!
-- AC ceases trolling TG --
Slight spoilers for future updates:
...And that pretty much closes up the more "unimportant" members of the Millennium, or at least the ones that won't be interacting with the kids that much. Well... Hydra won't really matter that much aside from one little part that may or may not be after the Mario Intermission.
The ship lands in 8-3. The trolls get out here. Hank is there, Hydra flys off carrying Janitor, Luke, and Zorin, leaving then from your grasp, making you mad. Captan stayed hidden within the ship
ok that was all.
[I] FLH: Take a SWAG swig of 7up.
OH SHOT THE 4 SETS OF MILES HAVE IT PROSPIT!
FIRE ME: look out jade!
-- undyingUmbrage [uu] began jeering uranUmbra [UU] at 1:51 pm --
uu: HAY "SIS."
UU: oUh moUther fUck eh.
uu: WACH YOuR LANGAGE.
uu: REMEMBER. WERE IN SPRINGFELD STILL.
uu: ALSO. I DI NOT THINK YOU WOULD ANSWER SO SOON.
UU: er... its noUt like we have soUme bizzare bUllshit like sharing a boUdy.
UU: cuz coUme oUn hoUw woUld Us sharing boUdy even woUrk.
uu: I DON'T KNOW. BuT AGAIN. YOuR MOuTH. WATCH IT.
uu: SO LET'S TOCK ABOuT. THESE IDIIOTS PLAYING THIS MARIO GAME.
uu: I'LL SET uP THE MONITOR SO YOu CAN SEE WAT I'M SEEING.
FIRE ME: COME AT ME, BRO!
uu: AS YOu CAN SEE, THIS JOHN HAS BECOME VEDY VEDY CONFIDENT COMPARED TO THE OTHER ONE, AND THAT'S SAYING A LOT.
UU: shoUw doUnt tell yoU fUcking moUroUn.
uu: THE GuY HAS ALWAYS BEN HELLBENT ON DOING SHIT THAT WOuLD GET HIM KILLED.
uu: BuT BEFORE, THAT WAS BECAuSE HE WAS A PATHETCI, SAD LITTLE BOY.
uu: NOW, HE'S TRYING TO BE "HEROIC."
uu: PROTECING HIS LITTLE WAIFu JADE.
uu: AND DAVE.
uu: OVER ACHIVING. BuT A SuCKER.
uu: JuST WACH. HE'S ALWAYS BEEN ABOuT IRONY, AND THE IRONIC PART IS.
uu: HE'S GONNA GET FIRSTHAND EXPERIENSE OF DRAMATIC IRONY.
UU: what are yoU toUcking aboUt?
UU: have yoU, seen this oUr soUmething?
uu: NO. BuT THIS IS JuST. SO PREDICTABLE.
DS: what you were about to do was just JUMP right into the miles
DS: you know these things multiply and extend almost infinitley
DS: so jumping in front to try to "protect" jade is only putting yourself in danger like that
DS: the best way is to just get the hell out of the way
DS: or set up a barrier like this
DS: i also know about shipworms and they have this attack on them all the time
DS: just that this one can extend it with the whole wierd fusion shit that just happened
DS: you see the miles will just kind of swerve around this little shield i have set up here and-
uu: ABOuT TIME WE GET ANOTHER DETH.
UU: oUh coUme oUn.
UU: dave was jUst a dreamself there. noU oUne gives a fUck aboUt dreamselfs.
UU: and jade coUld get revived by anUy 1-Ups aroUnd here.
uu: DAVE'S CONJuRED PROSPIT REPLICA. DOES NOT HAVE 1uPS YET.
uu: SO uNLESS THERE WAS A WAY TO REVIVE.
uu: THEN HAHAHAHAHAHA!
uu: MWA HA HA!
UU: if yoU want toU villain doUn't say "mwa ha ha" it makes yoU looUk retarded.
uu: I'LL JuST. SHOW YOu. SOLLuX AND MEENAH NEXT.
uu: THE GEEK AND THE JERSHY SHORE REJECT.
FIRE ME: oh noez!!
FIRE ME: it's sadstuck now. T_T
Captain staying inside the ship was actually because I forgot to put him into the first image. If it wasn't for that, he would have been with the rest of the Millennium. Oh, how a mistake actually changes the plot just a little...
UU: "geek and jersey shoUre reject..."
uu: SHuT uP.
uu: SO WHAT HAPENED IS THAT THERE IS A LITTEL TWIST JuST OuTSIDE THE CAPTOR'S HOuSE.
uu: BuT I WON'T SHOW IT TO YOu JuST YET.
uu: YOu''LL SEE IT WHEN MEENAH SEES IT.
uu: BuT I'LL PREVIEW YOu THIS.
MP: this fuckin computer is MIN----E!
uu: SHE JuST SCREWED HERSELF OVER.
UU: OUH NOUES!!!
UU: SOULLUXU KUN!!
UU: HE'S KO'D!!!!!
UU: i hazd crUsh oUn him.
-- diamonsDawg [DD] began trolling caligisAquarium [CA] at 1:54 pm --
DD: terezi told me you said there is only 1 person hoo likes you
DD: and then she peaked at your screen and saw that pink-purple blooded neepta
DD: how can you think that nepete was 1 who likes you over me??
CA: i was in a fit of rage an tyrian nep wanted me to contact her if somethin major happens betwen me and fef
CA: plus i meant the coolkid wwho not just liked me but i also liked back
CA: you scare the bejeebuz out of me
DD: ok fin be that way
-- DD ceases trolling CA --
MP: gawd dangit hoo is it?
uu: OH BOY. HERE IT COMES.
uu: IT LOOKS LIKE. AT SOME POINT.
uu: The Evil CALL A BuNCH OF HIS ARMY TO SEND OVER TO TROLLS TOWN.
uu: MWAH HA HA.
uu: WITH SOLLuX. ONE OF THE MORE STRONGER TROLLS. GONE. MEENAH'S IN DEEP CRAP.
UU: noooooU! doUn'yt hUrt soUllUxx!
uu: AND FINLY.
uu: I SHOW u TYIAN NEPETA AND HER BRILLIANT P[LAN.
[I] Jack: Fall in a shockingy INAPORPIATE MATER.
JACK IN THE BOX NAKED!
UU: wat is this poUrn?
uu: I JuST.
uu: GOT THE CAMRA AT THE WRONG SPOT.
uu: AT THE WONG TIME.
Meenah's eye being red-tyrian in the fourth panel was originally a mistake that I decided to throw in anyway. (I actually looks kind of cool.) It's not anything plot relevant.
Marceline uses VAMPIER PHYCICKS to levitate the other bossess to get them back to the boss room.
UU: i wanna see what hapens toU the boUssess!
uu: OK FINE. JEEZ.
Also The Evil is levitating himself using his own mageic so that he doesn't fall after the tower he was on lost itts top (LOL lost it's top.)
UU: oUh noUes!
UU: this thing is still Up ther!
UU: doUn't harm soUllUx oUr gamzee!
uu: I THOuGHT YOu ONLY CARRED ABOuT KID HuMENS AND TROLLS.
uu: AND ANCESTORS.
UU: well yeah and this coUnserns them!!!!
uu: SHE'S SETTING IT SO THAT IT WILL CRASH ON THAT SSTuPID LAB RITE AWAY!
uu: AND THEN ALL THE GOOD TWIN TROLLS. WILL DIE.
uu: MWA HA HA!
uu: DAVE RuINGS EVERYTHING!
UU: *with soUme Us tossed in that smilyy.
UU: it seems he can oUnly reech oUver toU change it soU that it lands a littel higher then befoUre...
UU: dat nep is OUNE TUFF FITER.
uu: THEY STILL DIE, BuT IN LESS TIME.
uu: OHH YESSSSSS.
uu: DAWN OF THE FINALK DAY MOTHERHuGGERS.
uu: AND ONLY A FEW MINITES REMAIN BEFORE THE CRITICAL EVENT.
uu: NOT YOu DYING, BuT THAT WOuLD BE GR8.
uu: I MEEN THE 1 THAT WILL HAPEN AT 2:14.
UU: oUh noUez!!!!!
-- uu ceses jeering UU --
CURRENT internetExplorer [CIE] began opening memo titled "GUYS WE IN DAGGER!!" at 14/2/2012 1:56 pm UTC-6:00 --
CIE: GUYS THERES METOR HEDDING TO THIS LA8!!!!!!!!
CIE: WE NEED TO GET OUTTA HERE REALLY FASTER!!!!!!!!
-- CURRENT intermissionIntermission [CII] RITE NOW joined memo at 14/2/2012 1:56 pm UTC-6:00 --
CII: serket are you fuckin shittin me?
CIE: NO MEGIDO!!!!!!!! NOT AT ALL!!!!!!!!
[I HAD TO GESS A1 MEGIDO'S PERSONALITY UNTIL SHE SEEN OK? ALSO SHE'S NOT REELY VERMILLION BLOOD THOSE DON'T EXIST (hussie said only 12 colors & mutants) BUT IN NEXT COLOR TO HELP DIFERENSIATE HER WITH ARADIA.]
If the A1 trolls had been revealed up to this point, then the next updates would have been about them screwing around while the tower thing is falling. But since they haven't...
His Future Future Dream Self conjures a sword which then cuts one of the tentacles of the miles so that Jade's body can be removed from it more easily in case anyone were to try to toss it into a 1up.
The dreamself itself soon vanishes and goes towards the afterlife, going into a state where it will continue to exist at several points of the Four Hells and One Heaven until it runs out of energy and fades.
[I] All: React to Jade's deth.
FIRE ME: T_T
LH: it dozent matter if you a titular character, ypou can STILL die for realz in a great pikmin fan fan fiction!!!!!! WE: This is of most the sads.
WE: I just reelized... we never got to no her that much.
ΓH: Well goly!
ΓH: This is trooly a shocking twist huh?
RL: Even Dirk is surprised.
RL: no i thick hes just tripping about that kiss
AM: ...if she had a active dreemself outside of her dreams and into the material plane then mjkissing the corpse can bring make the dreemself take over
TN: nO,,,,, tHAT'S ONLY cOOLSUCK STUFF,,,
AM: i shit you not that works in the reel world
AM: i wuld say try it yourself but jade no have active dreamself
AM: so kissing her wuld just be kissing corpse and ew...
ES: Jane i no this must be a tuff time but there still miles out therE
TP: TH1S G4M3 1S D4NG3ROUS >:[
TP: 1 4M S3R1OSLY R3CONS1D3R1NG MY CRUSH ON D4V3
VS: And I never got to karma her for the me calling her a moron.
EZ: D --> John you just lost your frend there
EZ: D --> This may be trubling
EZ: D --> Can i offer you towel?
ME: I'M STILL MAD ABOUT THE UPDATE1
ME: ME TOO!
EZ: D --> Karkat your thots?
EZ: D --> Youve been stranding there smiling
EZ: D --> Its kind of disturbing
KV: THE GIRL WAS A FUCKING CREEP.
KV: AND HAD ANGER ISSUES.
KV: I CAN'T FELL ANYTHING BUT HAPPYNESS AT THE BITCH'S DEATH.
LH: hay i was that same fucking creep up until the inword jorny!!!!!
KV: YEAH WELL YOURE STILLA LOT LIKE HER.
KV: HELL YOU BOTH EVEN TRYED TO MAKE OUT WITH YOUR BROTHER/SISTER JAKA.
KV: I NO FOR TROLLS THATS OK BUT FOR HUMENS THATS A NO-NO.
GM: DaMn DoUbLe StAnDeRs? :O?
RL: PEOPLE LETS NOT OPEN THAT CAN OF WORMS :C
RL: just........ trust me, ok?
EA: bitch that The Evil has nothin on me
FP: O)( MY GLOB T)(IS IS A P--ERMA KILL AIN'T IT????
KM: I MUST REVENGE THE MAN BEHIND THIS
[I] KM: Revenge Jade
You can't jump that high up from Prostpit back to World 8.
Meenwile John and Jean was causing trouple on Prospit (breking random things) so PM finly does something and smacks them a littel to try to get them to calm down.
[I] EA: Show that your not jus FOREVVER ALONE joke in this fan fic and KICK SUM ASS!!!
You STRONGJUYMP off Prospit! And unlike Kanaya you pull it off!
FUCK YEAH!!!!! YOUR GONNA SHOW The Evil who's boss!
-- caliginaoutAcquarium [CA] began trolling turntechGodhead [TG] at 2:00 pm --
CA: yo stri
CA: your the man behind this mario game right?
TG: yeah me sollux and some weird dudes from nintendo
CA: wwell i havve a message for you
CA: fuck you
-- CA ceases trolling TG --
I'd like to remind everyone that this isn't the first time in SJAHJ that Eridan looked up someone's skirt.
EDIT: Added paragraph to first panel clairifying where Future Future Dream Dave went.
Last edited by Great Pikmin Fan; 08-24-2012 at 09:03 PM.
This eends the miles. Noone has to be of worry anymore.
Good Yoshi sees a TASTY TREET land by him.
(HE WAS WONDERING AROUND IN 8-4 BTW OK?)
He eets The Evil.
B/c of the blackhole it causes a TRANSFORM to take plase.
Good Yoshi transform into BOSHI. (Blackhole Yoshi)
wtf I forgot these asshole existed 4 a minite.
Yeah. Revenge Five. They see Good Yoshi and shit. Good Yoshi cannot recognize Evil Yoshi since they've been both seprated at birth AND taken different forms now.
[I] Past Future Dream DS: Find Meenah.
Oka- now what in the name of hell is going on here?
DS: ok what
DS: why are there wriggler nepetas everywhere
DS: and why is sollux knocked out
MP: whale i no jack shit aboat the nepetas they just showed up insted of this sweet computer i wanted
MP: but i no of the sollux
MP: i culdnt get jades so i wanted solluxes computer and then i yanked it from him
DS: this house is like surrounded by members of the koopa gang or whatever its called nowadays
MP: its called the koop troop you fucking moron
DS: well yeah
MP: so anyway YAY itrs a dreem dave i )(OP--------E im saved!
MP: rite? you AR-E as asskicking as they say?
MP: cuz im not gonna gush over you like everyon else dooes and assume that you can suddewnly save everyone
MP: im gonna keep eye on you to see if your really badass
DS: so youre like the heather to my alejandro if i understand
MP: the fuck?
DS: anyway i think im almost out of dream-ness for this dreamself
DS: i need a little more backup
DS: i can only keep these assholes out of the way until my meter runs empty and this dreamself fades
DS: but my realself will get memories of this dreamself and any other dreamselfs and maybe he can come up with this plan
DS: prefferably one that uses those two dreamselfs i made yesterday that havent used temporal replicsimile
MP: water they doing?
DS: well last time i checked one of them is STILL messing around with the obsessive side of my fanclub
DS: the other one is continuing the analysis of the writting on the bedroom walls of my, the lalondes, the egberts, and the harleys house
MP: what writting?
DS: youll see later
To clairify, the pink thing in the third panel is Good Yoshi's tounge, and the purple is the "magic" of the Chinese food black hole.
I completely forgot to edit the third page yesterday so that it's in spoilers. No, I won't do two pages today, but I might do page 4 tomorrow or at some point during the week.
[I] Past Future Dream DS: So something SBURB-y.
You open the CRUXTRUTORS that it turns out were in this room the entire time but offscreen. You used a THROWMP that you also had the entire time.
DS: ok meenah dont throw ANYTHING in ANY of these if you want to live
DS: this dreamself doesnt have much time before it vanishes
DS: look i conjured prospit and sollux helped me make these things
DS: so if im right then once these will be prototyped
DS: ill make the prospitian army stronger
[I] Past Future Dream DS: Run out of energy and cease to exist.
[I] Past Future Dream DS: Be Jade.
You cannot be Jade because Jade isn't in the Mario session!
...Where is she?
JH: where m i dawg?
EC: TIME TO DIE BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!
JH: dont hurt me!!!
JH: i.... suddenly gotz rifle??
EC: THANKS FOR CONJURING UP THIS RIFLE!!!!!!!!!!!
EC: NOW I DON'T HAVE TO WASTE TIME THICKING UP SOMETHING TO KILL YOU WITH!!!!!!!!!!!
JH: *iinsert "being stangeled" sounds here*
JH: *ok ok fine i;'ll do them*
JH: calw calw cough coff
EC: COUNT SOME SHEEP YOU SLEPPY BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!
JH: OH FUCK YOPU!!!!!!!!
JH: dont be playing no shit with me asshole!!
JH: TELL ME WHERE I AM!!
JH: (if u no that is)
EC: where dead.
JH: aw shit i new it
JH: i meen last thing i remember before this was getting impaled thru the chest
JH: and well you dont survive that rite?
EC: shut up and let me tock.
EC: hay! you wanna no about dis rite?
EC: weell this is the begining to the afterlife.
JH: the afterlife is just one big waiting room??
JH: o man it really is hell then.....
EC: dude this is the BEGINNING of the afterlife!!!!!
EC: EVERYONE from EVERY universe in The Multiverse goes here when they die!!!!!!!!!!!
EC: you have to fill out some shit aand then they deside over whether you'll go to heven or get to pick which of the 4 hells u go to.
JH: 4 hells? are you high or just stupid?
EC: theres red hell purple hell gray hell and black/cthulu hell.
EC: i dunno much becides that.
EC: and that you can conjured stuff here like a dreamself.
EC: even tho i've been here before.
EC: well i died then came back to life then this bitch rip killed me again and ate me.
EC: she's a vampire so that would normally make me like a part of her thru some weerd voodoo shit.
EC: then i managed to escape and tried to mess her up.
EC: we had a fite and i managed to blow up her backup computer.
EC: but she still has those glassess.
EC: the asploshon killed me so whoops i guess i defied her plan and asm now a afterlife.
Minor spoilers for later updates:
We won't be focusing on the A1/good twin troll batch again for some time.
Re: Sweet Jade(?) and Hella John: Now more SBURB-y
JH: so this is where go to be jujed for afterlofe?
DESK PERSON: Yes.
JH: hay i wanna say soemthing
JH: can i make comment?
DESK PERSON: Is it about you coming back to life?
DESK PERSON: Then ask.
JH: I DONT WANNA BE DED GOST I WANNA BE ALIFE!!!!
JH: HOW I ESCAPE?????
DESK PERSON: Nope. No one escapes unless your soul is brought back to life.
DESK PERSON: (Well, aside from those few instances...)
DESK PERSON: Look. Don't attempt escaping to life.
DESK PERSON: (Damn, everyone tries to escape after finding out that it's possible.)
DESK PERSON: It's really really hard, really really unadvised, and really really painful if you get stopped.
DESK PERSON: Just don't try to get out of the afterlife... please?
DESK PERSON: Look kid, you might be nice. You might get into Heaven.
DESK PERSON: People who get into Heaven get an extra, full, immortal body instead of being forced to stay as a ghost.
DESK PERSON: And you still get to see your friends and stuff!
DESK PERSON: So would you please not try anything funny and take a fill-out sheet?
JH: bitch i wana be alive
[I] A Dream DS: Get info from your realself.
This Dream Dave is within John's house, which had been warped to the Mario session. So you can be him.
Keep in mind that this is not the same Past Past Dave. He ran out of energy conjuring up Prospit.
-- CURRENT REAL turntechGodhead [CRTG] began Daving CURRENT DREAM turntechGodhead [CDTG] at 2:04 pm 14/2/2012 --
CRTG: hey team code wright
CRTG: thats the name i just made up for you guys right now by the way
CRTG: i just got memory from the other set of dream mes that used temporal replicsilime
CRTG: heres the heads up
CRTG: i conjured prospit from coolstuck and thanks to the millennium its now over at 8-4
CRTG: jade is dead and both prospit and most of the guys are probably screwed up there too
CRTG: john and who appears to be a genderbent clone of him are pissed off at my update (just as planned) and smashing shit up there
CRTG: to make prospit even worse last time i looked there i saw all this stringy deadly shit with colors that matched troll quadrants
CRTG: tyrian nepeta messed with the coordinates of the quantum scatterer and now the good twin trolls are in danger
CRTG: sollux is knocked out and theres an army by his hive
CRTG: meenahs also fucking shit up over there CDTG: what do you want me to do about it
CRTG: stop writting down the letters go to the lalondes house get some really powerful beer and come to my place
CRTG: you see all that i was telling you wasnt so that i could give you a shitload of specific commands or anything
CRTG: you dont have to worry about that until you become me
CRTG: which if this goes as planned wont happen until after i finish what im thinking of
CRTG: i just wanted to tell you how real shit is so you can hurry your ass over to my place
CRTG: oh and one more reason to hurry
CRTG: i almost forgot CDTG: 10 more minutes until that critical event?
-- CRTG ceased Daving CDTG --
(Kanaya takes Rose and Roxy's chaos emerald for emfasis.)
KV: THERE WILL BE NO TROLL/HUMEN IN PROSPIT!
Don't get too used to six panels a day instead of five. I've just been doing it like that for these recent updates because I thought that each of them would work better should I add the one extra panel in to them.
And yes, Dirk is still stunned in shock over that makeout with Joan.
Re: Sweet Jade(?) and Hella John: First corpsesmooch!
WHAT THE HELL????
THIS IS WHAT A 1UP TRANSFER REALLY LOKS LIKE UP CLOSE
THEY PULL THE LIFE FROM THEM AND GIVE IT TO OTHERS
Show 2Jade log
LH1: yo sup
LH2: last thing i remember i in hell?
LH1: you were
LH1: WE were
LH1: but then suddenly, i came back to life with 7 extra lifes!!!!!
LH1: i used one of them to bring yu back so now im at 6
LH1: i gess the 7up i drank earlier was a LITERRAL 7up in that it gave my life 7?
LH1: hay what hapened to the deadly stringy stuf?
EA: you can thank me for that
EA: i took out the sourse
KM: Hay Jade Thsat Was A Corpse That Karkat Made Kiss Dirk
KM: I Haz This Cool Looking Flower I Piked Up From Vrsiak During The Ship Ride
KM: I Want You To Eet It
LH2: karat made me do WHAT??????
LH1: dont worry i slapped him for u
LH2: no!!!!! i wanna slap him too!!!!
KV: OH NOEZ!q
FIRE ME: hay! this is kinda like when i died cuz of robosanta!
See what I meant by the six panels thing? Hell, the update itself is kinda short, what with two of the images having no caption text/dialogue at all and two more having only really short captions. The reason for the short (but very plot heavy and important) update is both me not thinking much needs to happen in this scene, and me also kind of wanting to work on some other stuff (the latter of which was why I didn't try to go for double the now-typical number of pages). Although originally the respawned Jade (Jade1) was to kill Karkat in revenge for the kiss and use one of her six lifes to bring him back, then Roxy's head would explode from the whole deal and Jade1 would use another life to revive her (also healing the injuries she got from the dog mauling), but... eh... I decided against that. It was pretty much a last-second decision, though.
LH1: kanaya wy u no give dat to me????
KM: Becuz You Were Tails Not Heads On My Coin
LH1: coiin flips r STUPID
LH1: hoo are you there wth the teelblood?????
TP: 1M T3R3Z1 PYROP3
TP: 1 W34S TR4V3L1NG WITH YOU FOR TH3 3NT1R3 T1M3
TP: YOU DON'T NOT1C3 M3?
LH1: well tbh your kind of a living prop here so its not that easy TO remember that you still exist
LH1: whens the last time you ever did somethin thats not related to romanse?
TP: COM3 TO TH1NK OF 1T N3V3R
TP: FROM TH3 B3G1NN1NG OF TH1S 4DV3NTUR3 1 W4S JUST MS ROM4NC3 4LL 4ROUND
TP: WH3N 1 F1RST 4PP34RED-
LH1: no no don't be an explosition!
LH1: this isnt homestuck act 6 act 3, this is SJAHJ intermission act 4!!!!
KV: WAHT YOU THINK YOURE DOINGH?
[I] MME, FME: Break Proshit's chain.
THEY WERE ON PROSPOIT BY THE WAY NOT IT'S MOON.
WE: John and Jean lissen to your sister and sexclondebiological brother and stop this!
WE: YUeah just shut up and enjoy the comik. WE: Dude the comic is what pissed them off in the first place.
WE: Oh yeah.
ES: LooK Why dont you just wach some nick cage and everything wilL-
[I] FME: POW! RITE IN KISSER!
They fly to WORLD 6! (hay its the only world i didn't put that much focis on aside from World 1 but fuck world 1)
12/13 CATTROLLS INTRODUCED.
Show Penultimate Nepeta log
NL: :7= < sup
WE: Oh my god theres too many nepeats.
WE: Say u look witter then the others.
WE: Am I just seeing things or...?
NL: :7= < i rainbow drinker! WE: !!!
ICE Jade hasn't spoken yet because I haven't decided her text color yet...
OH YES THE END OF PAUSE 3 UPDATE HAD ABSOLUTLEY FUCKING PERFECT TIMING!
I updated the mirror yesterday (the first half of this) but not the thread because I sort of thought that if I tried that yesterday it would be a... long process because of the busy servers. Turns out that wasn't completely the case.
Theres POYSON all over this forest. You can't cross a RIVER Of it.
ES: So nepetA
ES: How do we p[articularly get out of herE
NL: :7= < hrm...
NL: :7= < yu know 7he poyson was no7 supposed to be 7his high wile you go 7hru 7his plane7
NL: :7= < you being here a7 7his 7ime was no7 par7 of plan
WE: AW FUCK!!!!
NL: :7= < hang on hang on
NL: :7= < im sure 7he nepe7a leagon can come up wi7h some7hing
NL: :7= < of which i am a par7 of
[I] Tyrian NL: Do something to piss off Dave.
Prospits moon (which was falling after John and Jean cut chain) hedding towards the QS too so you set the coordinates to Earth to try to get it to crash on house. The falling moon es in PANEL WITHIN PANEL SMALL.
Unfortunatly this Dream Dave fucks around with the controls again and it will ends up floating outside Alternia, 3 YEERS IN PAST.
[I] Tyrian NL: Conjur DERSE
You sleep and your dreamself coenjured DERSE to ALSO piss Dave off.
YOUR REELY NOT THINKING RITE HUH?>
[I] MP: ALSO also poiss off Dave by prototyping something funky.
Yu run over to the Maryam's house and get 1 of Kanaya's SHITTY VAMPERER BOOKS. (HAHAHA I MACKED FUN OF TEILIGHT IT'S FUNNY BECUZ WEVERYONE ELSE IS SAYING TWLIGHTING SUCKS GET IT THAT THE JOKE!!!!)
PORRIM (yea i red update) isn't still there cuz she's w/ other good twins.
DUN DUN DUN!!!!!
[I] GY: STRIFE with Evil 0Yoshi
GOOD TIN V EVIL TWIN!
GY: You smell familar...
EY: Yes. you too smell simlar.
EY: Like we were hached from the sam egg...
GY: Wate. Charizatrs re eggs?
EY: I was born in a egg as YOSHI on a yellow ship and then this green twin hopped out of egg and I was still there in the egg then the egg was on fyre and I got nocked down cuz the ship I was on fell down and then now I woke in snow but later I became CHARIZARD after evolving.
GY: Well I waz in THAT SAME EGG im sure and I tagged teemed with this guy John and also shortly after this girl nepeta and then another Guy Dirk.
GY: We then wocked alot and eventually I was in pit and used wissel to get out but it was reely warp wissel so I go to World 8-4.
GY: Down ther I was reunite but eventually they tried to made me go into ANOTHER PIT and I was like, "AW FUCK NO" and left.
GY: Then there was this villan guy The Evil and he was fused apparantly with a blackhole and a shiperworm and I was hungry and ate them.
GY: Then I became BOSHI.
EY: I think we good/evil twins!?
GY: Yes and yu seem to be badguy so now I kill you.
Unfortunly he's too strong 4 you even after you become BOSHI.
Hm... what charhazards week to, now that EVIL YOSHI is a charazards?
[I] KV: Apolgize for KICKING KANAYA.
KANKRI never kicked Kanaya!
(THIS TAKED PLACE A LITTLE IN THE PAST BTW)
[Since Karkat and Kankri have the same initials, they will be denoted with "-KV" and "+KV" respectivley in commands, as with the human kids and Simpsonians.]
KV: Aranea i d9nt meen t9 s9und tr96ling 6ut y9u l99k a little stressed.
KV: Wat is meening?
AS: W8R8 8LL GONN8 DIE REELY SOON IF NO MIRICLES 8RE H8PP8N!!!!!!!!
AS: A G8ANT TOW8R PIESE FORM THE M8RIO S8SSION IS HE8DING STRATE TOW8RDS US!!!!!!!!
LP: wh4t m4r1o s3ss1on?
AS: You no wat I'm not in the mood to exposit.
AS: Porrim, will you take oners?
PM: The autho+r o+f webco+mic Co+o+lstuck and so+llus capto+r has co+llarbo+rated with nintendo+ to+ make this game.
PM: Fo+ur kids have been transpo+rted themselfs into+ the virtual reality.
PM: Are siblings are all in there to+o+.
PM: since the ho+uses in tro+ll to+wn have been warped there until after the game will be finished..
PM: And so+me stuff happened as far as I'm aware o+f.
LP: 4r3 you h1gh or just r33ly r33ly stup1d?
PM: I can assure yo+u o+ne thing.
PM: I am no+t stupid.
PM: I do+ no+t kno+w abo+t drugs since me into+llerable sister smo+kes so+ much.
KV: Hay speeking 9f kanaya she gave me this sh9rtly bef9re we left t9 the meeting.
KV: I didn't wanna sh9w y9u 6ut since we may 9r may n9t die I will anyway.
[I] +KV: Show Porrim the paper.
YOU CANNOT COMMAND KANKRI CUZ HE'S NOT IN MARIO!!!!@!
But he does the thing anyway.
LP: worst l4st wordzz 3v3r. D:<
LP: 1f w3 m4k3 1t out of h3r3 4l1v3, do you w4nt m3 to sl4p k4n4y4 for you?
PM: She's ashally VERUY classy if she's so+ber.
LP: but th4tz not th3 c4s3 v3ry off3n M 1 R1T3????
PS: Hi hi mateS. I couldnt help but notise tyou saying you were in danger therE.
AS: Purerco, get leeve us alone.
PS: Im a limeblooD. And a pyrokinetic one at thaT. I have the powers to smash that fucking bilding in hafF.
PS: aNd, i CAN GET THAT OTHER MARYAM OFF THE DRUGs!
PS: MateS, Be honesT.. You need mE.
[I] PS: Reveel self.
Since you cannot command Puerco eether she just revveels part of self.
PS: What do you saY, MateS?
I promise that this will be the final perspective change before a... pretty large set of events. And yes, the Mario Intermission is so close to finally ending for real this time.
Kankri's sweater has a sign on it because this is a universe where Karkat has an assigned sign and since Kankri is related to Karkat by the bizzare good/evil spell it wouldn't make sense for his own "relative" to have a sign while he doesn't.
Forgot to add both Kankri and Porrim's horns in the third image. As soon as I realized this, I added them to this massive template page I have for recurring SJAHJ sprites.
Re: Sweet Jade and Hella John: "Porrem [sic] Maryam Is Impolite!"
AS: Go cut the tower up youself if you so proud.
KV: I d9 n9t want t9 9ffend puerc9 6ut theres 9ffchanse that she amay fail.
KV: sh9ld i alert the 9thers a69ut thi predicament?
AS: No need. I set up memo.
LP: fuck, l3tz ch3ck d4 sh1t.
-- CURRENT electileDyzfunktion [CED] began responding to memo --
CED: yo yo yo just 4l3rt1ng 3v3ryon th4t 1 no of th1s too.
CED: 1 ont w4nn4 b3 d34d th4t would suck r4w 4sscocks.
-- CURRENT eternalInvincibility [CEI] began responding to memo --
CEI: Also+ Kankri is aware o+f this.
CEI: No+w, becuz o+f wat happened last time...
-- CEI banned DE from memo across all time. --
-- CURRENT carcinoGenetisic [CCG] responded to memo --
CCG: OH NOEZ KANKRI!!!!!!
CCG: YOU... UM...
CCG: ARANEA. NORMALY I NO ASK 4 DIS...
CCG: BUT PLEESE TELL ME THE EXACT SITUATION MY LOITTLE BABBY BROTHER IS IN SO I CAN TRY MY DAMDEST TO SAVE HIM T_T
-- CURRENT centarsTesticle [CCT] began responsing --
CCT: D --> Karkat ive never sen you act this way
CCT: D --> I gess you reely due...
CCT: D --> ARE A TRAJIC GOOD GUY INSIDE!
CCT: D --> How hartwarming
CIE: Equius ive never seen you so a8iding to Karkat.
CIE: What recent events have occured to due that????????
CCT: D --> Karkat and i r matesprites
CIE: SHUT. YOUR. ASS.
CIE: Did any other new couples 8loom over the corse of the Mario sesion?
CED: nows not th3 t1m3 for rom4nt1c sh1t, s3rk3t.
CED: *good s3rk3rt.
CED: w3r3 1n d4ng3r h3r3!
-- CURRENT anarchistsGrip [CAG] ressponded to memo --
CAG: OH SHIT!!!!!!!!
CAG: Latula, I forgot to add yu to my karma list for getting rid of your sense of smell!!!!!!!!
CED: k4rm4 l1st?
CAG: Long story.
-- CURRENT adiousTorranado [CAT] responded to memo --
CAT: tHANS TO THE KARMA LIST, vRISKA MADE ME ABEL TO WALK,
CED: uim... 1 dont r33lly w4nt my SM#LL!NG b4ck
CED: not 4s long 4s 1 l1v3 n3xt to k4n4y4 th3 w33dsmok3r
-- CURRENT grimAxilax [CGA] responded --
CGA: Can We Stop Tocking About My Pot Smoking Like Its The Only Thing About My Character
-- CGA unbans DE from memo --
-- CUIRRENT directionalEnlightenment [CDE] responded to memoooo --
CDE: N9w I haz can t9ck ab9ut stuff.
CDE: Karkat wy y9u say im y9ur y9unger 6r9ther.
CDE: Were twins.
CDE: In fact we even shared the same 69dy f9r a day after 6eing 69rned.
CDE: (h rite vriska.
CDE: I appreciate the fact that y9u have begun making what is apperantly a list t9 und9 all y9ur wr9ngings and stuff.
CAG: Yeahg thats whayt Karma list a8out.
CDE: Why th sudden explicativ?
CDE: did y9u get a sp9ntani9us case 9f t9rrets?
CAG: I was just........
CAG: It was a insult to you.
CAG: Imma add you to my list so I can make up for that.
CAG: What do you want me to do.
CDE: I dont 6eleeve in controlling.
CAG: Your 8reaking my 8alls, Kankri.
CAG: I guess you can say........
CAG: Your 8reking my........
CAG: Eight 8alls!
CDE: I d9 n9t want t9 put are, what 9ne may call, "relati9nship" in risk.
CDE: T9 d9 that w9uld leed t9 an un6alance alm9st as b6ad as the hem9spoectrim.,.
CCG: KANKRI IF YOU DONT MAKE SOMETHING FOR VRIKA TO DO SHE'LL BITCH ABOUT IT TO EVERYONE THAT HER LIST IS ALL "UNKARMA-ABLE" NOW IF YOU DIE-
CCG: (which i hope yu dont)
CCG: AND IT WILL ANNOY THE HELL OUTTA OF EVERYONE!!!!!
CGG: KANKRI LISSEN TO YOUR OLDER BROTHER FOR ONCE!
CDE: I just t9ld y9u we are technicly the exact same age d9wn t9 the micr9sec9nd.
CDE: y9u cann9t 6e 6i9l9gically 9lder as far as we n9w.
CDE: Y9u may identify as 9lder 6ut that is als9 tr9u6ling t9 me in that it implies a "IMMA DOMININT" thingy.
CDE: Als9, I never "lissen" cuz y9u alm9st never say anything t9 me in the furst place.
CCG: I'D RATHER PUT UP WITH YOUR WALLS OF TEXR THEN VRISKA'S IF VRISKA IS ANGRY
CAG: Hay I rite here u know.
CCG: I NO
CIE: What a8out my wall of text compared to Vriska?
CCG: ARANEA, YES.
CCG: WITE TEXT GUY, HELL NO.
To be honest I'm pretty much just making up the smaller details like Vriska and Kankri's interactions up as I go along.
Re: Sweet Jade and Hella John: 'derze so much goin on man HAHAHA wut
I'm very tempted draw the remaining A1s in the appearance of their leaked sprites but I really don't like using stuff that hasn't happened yet. Hell, I personally think it might be kind of rude to Hussie.
-- CURRENT carginGnostic [CGG] responded to memo --
CGG: yo yo yo
CCG: JUDE GET THE HELL OFF THIS MEMO
CGG: (this took plase when yoou thought jade was dead BTW since this alffa (beta?) trollthing takes place in past)
CGG: hay i just gotr counterpart killed soi wanna memo you guys to get the sadness away
CGG: sfcuk im surrounded by sadstuck
CCG: JADE. NO.
CDE: Say is this the pers9n h99 kept the triggering me?
CGG: hrm... come to think of it, "derectionalEnlighentment sounds kinda familiars.......
CGG: o yeah. that time long ago
CGG: when a huje bunch of you assholes trolled me and i countertrolled you (not troll like you guys but troll like the internet asshole)
CGG: and i made a... racy joke about his blood
CED: r4cy? >8?
CGG: racy by mr fuckass's standers.
CGA: What Was The Joke
CGG: hahaha funny rite?
-- FUTURE derecshonallEnlitment [FDE] from 4 HOURSE LATER responds --
FDE: Jade i have since gr9wn acust9m t9 y9ur humen culture and given this "insensitive j9ke s9me th9t."
CDE: Reely? She was cleerly trying t9 9ffend us here.
CDE: It was n9t a matter 9f trying t9 6e hum9rus 6ut t9 6e t9tally edgey.
CDE: She was N9T g9ing t9wards hum9r value in the leest.
CDE: It was a strait up insult at 69th me, y9u, karkat, and tr9lll culture.
CDE: H9w can y9u 6e that 9pen t9 suhc a trigger-maker?
CDI: See this is wy i banned him.
CCG: I NO FROM THE TOIMESTAMP THAT KANKRI IS STILL ALIVE.
CCG: SO MY WORK HERE IS DONE.
FDE: Dave Strider savedd us.
FDE: N9t just me 6ut the 9ther 9f us tr9lls that hapened t9 6e at this sp9t.
FDE: even if the rees9n f9r that was f9r us 6eing c9nsidered the "g99d twin" tr9lls.
CDE: Why is it thaqt y9u regret the dave missi9n f9r classing us 6y the 6i9l9gical magic type we are m9re suited f9r, yet this cleerly 9ffensive girl with her j9kes a69ut tr9llsex is f9rgiven?
CDE: Als9, d9n't diss Dave Strider D:<B
CED: fuck m4n str1d3r 1s cool.
CGA: I Would Mary Him If I Wasnt Lezbian
CGA: Wait A Minite
CGG: yea kaanaya nothing you just said there makes any sense
CAG: Duuuuuuuude if I must confess Dave's a coolguy too.
CAT: hE CREEPED ME OUT ONSE, bUT IS A PRETTY COOL SGUY.
CGG: will everyon stop gushing about dave?
CCG: ILL ADMIT THAT HE'S THE MOST TOLERABEL OUT OF ANY OF THESE HUMEN KIDS.
CIE: Well not I feel a lot 8etter to say that I asidently confessing my love to him.
CCT: D --> Hes cute
CEI: O+h what the hell.
CEI: I have no+tisibly fo+und myself staring at him blushing.
CII: not to menshon that he has a nise butt
CIE: O wow Damara i forgot you on this memo.
-- CURRENT turntechGodhead [CTG] responded to memo --
CTG: hey guys
CTG: speaking of that rescue kankri mentioned
CTG: im about to start saving your asses very soon
CGG: dave yu saw eevryone was romanticlally harassing you >:(
CTG: jude you of all people should know
CTG: everyone loves dave
CCT: D --> Everyone
CCG: WOW CREPY.
[I] New-er Past Past Dream DS: Do something awesome.
You have since paused from noting Jane's mad scribblings on the wall. You will soon drift over from the Egbert's house to the Lalaonde's house, get some CANDY CORN LIQUOR (odd since there's another Dream Dave in that house. You're not sure why the Real Dave didn't ask HIM to do this), and drift over to the Real Dave, where he eagarly awaits drinking that shit. But this will happen offscreen, due to my lazyness.
So basically, you cannot be commanded for a little while soon.
Next couple of updates might only have three panels instead of five, but that's because they will be huge images.
Last edited by Great Pikmin Fan; 09-02-2012 at 11:48 PM.
Re: Sweet Jade and Hella John: More Like Sweet Dave and Hella Dave
[Un][I] DS: Unite.
You cannot command Da- oh fuck it.
When this set of updates is finished, I sorta-advise you to view them while listening to the FIRST half of Unite Synchronization.
-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering bulbiszButts [BB] at 2:08 pm --
TG: so bro
TG: just letting you know
TG: im about to save everyone
BB: Dirksz notactive.
BB: I hacked into shitload of computers and cameras that everyon had on them.
BB: He got kisserd by Joan and then Joan threw him to the ground and got into sloppy makeouts with Jane, Jake, and Jaka and for some reason Dirk was got srtunned.
TG: joan? jaka?
BB: Jane's male counterpart nd Jake's female counterpart.
TG: aw hell they did not go into the inward journey did they
BB: Yes. they did.
TG: so thats why johns text was suddenly pink at one point
TG: i thought he learned about it and was just messing with me
BB: Yu still don't hav memory from that Future Future Dream Self that got killed on Prosit?
BB: He saw all 4 counterparts.
TG: damn it
TG: you see
TG: i kind of wanted to try out that gatorade myself
The cover for Unite Synchronization is actually kind of fitting for SJAHJ as of now... and the last couple of hundred pages.
Spoilers for Act 2:
If you don't like how I'm overpowering Dave, don't worry, he's planned to get a huge downfall after the Mario intermission.
And then there's the whole really blatant clues raising the possibility that he's going to die.
Woah wait hold on pause the music. (Again, this should still be in the middle of the FIRST half, for the full flash effect.)
What the fuck.
EDWARDCULLENSPRITE: Hurp a Derp I'm a shitty jab at Twilight.
EDWARDCULLENSPRITE: Good afternoon Meenah.
EDWARDCULLENSPRITE: I'm sorry to say that your friend there seems to be knocked out cold.
EDWARDCULLENSPRITE: Should I try to use my sprite vampire powers to save him?
EDWARDCULLENSPRITE: Or would you rather let me take your place in fending off these Mario enemies.
EDWARDCULLENSPRITE: Sprites are good at fending off enemies you know.
MP: dave what the fuck
MP: i thot sprites were supposed to be naked 3;)
MP: this ripoff >3:(
MP: i wanted kanaya and porrim to see a naked edward colin and be all WUUUUUUT
MP: but no
DS: MEENAH WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST DO???
DS: you know this is gonna affect the prospit replica i conjured right
MP: t 3;P t
DS: its been one of those days
[Un][I] DS: Continue doing cool shit SBAHJ-style.
I kind of wonder why Jane/Dirk is called Portalshipping when the blue portal looks more like John's color.