> Shit: Happen.
[S]Liz: Where are you?
You are now standing in an empty space, the only sound audible to you being the wind.
Slowly, the details of your surroundings become apparent. Towering stone structures surround you, like buildings with no apparent entrance. Each seems to be a completely solid, single piece of grey or white stone, with strange symbols carved into them. The wind drags dust between these structures, and for a moment you think you can hear a voice or a melody from a musicbox, but then it is gone, swallowed by the blackness of the sky that seems to seep down towards you.
If you were capable of looking beyond yourself, of drawing back to see the entirety of the location you have found yourself in, you would see the arched shape of the top of the structures, and the grand inscriptions on the top of each, and the veritable maze that these stones create. You could see that at a point they suddenly end, and beyond them lies...
Well, that would be telling, now wouldn't it?
You remain standing in the middle of the cold place, lit only by the occasional burning torch connected to the structures that wall you in. In you right hand is the controller, and hanging on your arm is your umbrella, still dripping with rain. Beyond that, nothing familiar is around you.
> Press that button again to get back.
[U4G] OREG (A space adventure)
Starring Opabiniataurs, because humanoids are boring.
>Liz: Press that button again to get back.
It stands to reason that the button that (seemingly) got you here is going to be the one that got you back. You press it again, and nearly fall over in surprise as a large, blue, translucent square appears before you.
Figures. If it had been that easy, Chester would have been back by now.
After only about a second of being open, a chat window appears on the floating screen before you. A ghostly keyboard materialized, and you get right to work on replying to whoever is talking to you.
Chester remains unresponsive. You hope nothing has happened to him.
> Chester: Explain to her what you have learned. Also, tell her how to find the help screen.
> Shit: Happen.
>Chester: Explain what you have learned.
You would really love to do that. Really.
But right now you are running. Presumably for your life, if the screams are anything to go by.
That's right. There's more than one scream going. And they are horrible. High pitched screams that seem to have evolved from manic laughter, and they just don't stop.
Your lungs begin to ache as you jog up the incline. It's not too steep, but you've never been exceptionally athletic. You wouldn't be going this way if you didn't have any other clues on how to get out of here.
You stumble and nearly fall into the mouth of one of the trees, but right yourself just in time and continue your ascent.
>Chester: utilize physics! See if you can't eject the tree from your cards, and use the push from its forcible removal to- no, this is also stupid. KEEP RUNNING! Those are likely Gremlins... TO THE CAVE!
>Liz: Wander, be in awe. Do the stones feel cold?
>Liz: Wander, be in awe.
You begin to walk, the large floating screen following close behind. As is expected from your lack of tech savvy, you have no idea of how to make the thing go away. You don't really mind though, and it does add to the amount of light in the area.
You walk amidst the titanic monoliths, casually and without much thought brushing your fingertips along one as you pass by (over the course of a minute, it is quite large). It is cool to the touch, almost oddly so. You fingers graze over some symbols, apparently words of some sort, though not in a language or alphabet you've ever seen.
Despite this fact, you are able to make out a pattern. There appear to be a set of three words, followed by a small symbol in subscript which might or might not be equivalent to some sort of punctuation. Following this are two more sets of short symbols, between which lies an arrow, almost startling in its familiarity. About a hand's width of a gap exists afterwards, then the pattern repeats itself, albiet with different words.
In addition to these unintelligeable words, you see depictions of various huminoid figures, some small enough to be covered if you press your palm on them, others towering above you beyond sight. Two appear to be prominently used, with varying levels of detail. The first is a winged figure wielding two swords, with a blindfold over its eyes. The second is a cloaked figure with a face that is in a permanent state of sorrow (though perhaps due to the lighting, sometime it seems like anger).
Despite the dismal and potentially creepy surroundings, you find yourself at peace. The blowing of the wind, occasionally accompanied by what could be a voice just bellow your ability to register, is oddly soothing.
You hope Chester is having as nice a time as you are.
>Chester: KEEP RUNNING! TO THE CAVE!
You're running, you're running. Damn commanding presences in the periphery of your consciousness...
The trees are beginning to thin out once again, and you think you might see something like a wall in the distance. Then, without warning, one of the screams starts approaching you from behind. Fast.
You turn just in time to recieve a fruit to the face. It falls to the ground and you can see that it is half eaten, and sports a face that is either in fits of laughter or in increadible pain, and in either case is not being quiet about it.
Well, that explains where the screaming is coming from.
The sound of something much heavier than a piece of fruit falling to the ground comes from behind you, the direction of the wall, and presumably the cave.
Well, looks like you're going to find out if you can actually use a labcoat in a fight.
(Kinda goes without saying, though. Ah, well.)
> Shit: Happen.
Oh man, all these speculations and potential foreshadowings with Liz...
>Chester: Bring UMDP to bear. You may not be technically proficient with it, but if your foe sees you bearing a standard weapon, it should be all the easier to surprise it with coat-based attacks.
[music I'm not clever enough to weave into the narrative]
You turn to face your opponent. There is only one, for which you are thankful, but you have to assume that others are on the way. You will need to make this quick.
The foe you face appears at first glance to be some sort of monkey or similar primate. Of course, it lacks a prehensil tail, and thus cannot be a monkey.
Not to mention that monkeys don't usually possess ram-like horns.
Or tusks jutting out of its botton jaw.
Or birdlike talons on all four limbs.
This thing looks like whatever amounts to evolution around here decided to shop for spare parts in the bargain bin to put it together. You have a suspicioun most other creatures around here might follow a similar convention.
Great, you've been dropped in the magical equivalent of Australia. Just wonderful.
The thing which you assume to be a Gremlin makes several threatening motions towards you, grunting wildly. It advances, giving you no time to do anything like bring up the menu and get a weapon.
Good thing you went with a weapon you can wear.
>Chester: Evade! Duck and roll, using flapping cloth as a distraction if needed.
note to self: investigate short-cut commands
>Chester: Coattech lvl 7: FiIK.
> Shit: Happen.
You jump to the left just as the Gremlin is about to charge into you and claw you to death with its talons. It grazes your labcoat with its claws but this amounts to little more than a slight rip near the bottom of the material.
The Gremlin then proceeds to go on a rapid series of attacks, which you find you can easily dodge. You use the empty spaces of your labcoat instinctually, as though the idea of distracting someone with it to prevent injury had always existed in your mind. You can't help but feel a little like a matador, waving a cape at a bull and pulling away at the last moment.
>Coattech lvl 7: ERROR
Your weapon training is only level 1, and thus you only have access to Coattech lvl 1 and its variants.
This information finds its way into your mind without first presenting itself before your eyes, or in fact even making its way into your visual cortex. As before, it is as though it has always been there, even though you have no clue what Coattech is and how to perform a variant.
How is this information finding its way to you? How alarmed should you be that something (or someone) apparently has a direct route to the information centres of your brain?
>Stop thinking so hard and counterattack!
Got Portal 2? Come check out my maps, please!
Active Adventures (awaiting suggestions):
PersonS-like Persona, but not | An Aranor Adventure-high fantasy and adventure | Odd One Out-3 best friends, a kidnapped girl, an evil king, and elves | Beasts-a tale of survival | The Longest Flashback-fantasy noir, or something like that | GUIH-raising a dragon is harder than it sounds. | MageBound-Fantasy+"Stuck" | Creation-wherein the readers are the mind of a universe's omnipotent god | The College of Magic-pretty much what it says on the tin
lvl 1 coattech: Suave distraction
How to use the coat itself as a weapon... hmm...
Lvl 1 Coattech: Matador Gambit
Make it hurt the trees it holds so dear!
> Lvl 1 Coattech: Makeshift noose.
(I imagine the creative names come later.)
> Shit: Happen.
because making up names for attacks is fun also you need to shout the name of the attack for it to work, i know this game
>Chester: Stop thinking so hard and counterattack!
Wow, you kind of went off on a tangent there. Better get your head back into the game.
Surprisingly, you weren't doing that bad considering you weren't paying full attention. Apparently some amount of combat skill was imparted to you automatically with your weapon training. Which is an exceptionally good thing since you've never gotten into a fight before in you life.
You dodge to the left again as the Gremlin charges past, using your above average ADROITNESS. Turning a full 360, you drive your elbow into the creature's back with what little BRAWNINESS you can muster. The creature is thrown to the ground, but quickly recovers. Reading its body language, you can tell it is not going to be as reckless with its attacks as it was before. Which means that you're going to have to work a little harder to do some damage.
An idea makes its way into your mind unbidden.
No, not an idea.
>Lvl 1 Coattech
The words almost make their way out of your mouth, but you strain to remain silent. It won't do, but you are not shouting out such a bland attack name.
An urge hits you, to shout out something clever, something witty, something like....
"I guess No Noose is Good Noose!"
Wow, that was increadibly stupid. Should have just gone with the first name.
You rush at the Gremlin, going on the offensive for the first time and catching it off guard. You rush past it for a moment, confusing it further, before reaching for its neck with your right arm. You sleeve flies out, it had always been too long for your arms, but now it seemed to have almost imperceptably extended, and wraps itself around the creature's neck, as though guided by an invisible hand.
As you pull, a host of logical thoughts invade your mind. How is the sleeve staying in place? How is the fabric not tearing against the Gremlin's resistance?
You continue with these thoughts until you hear a pop. For a sickening moment you think something horrible has happened to the Gremlin's head, until you see its strangely immobile form begin to dissolve into points of light that promptly disappear.
You have won your first (real) battle!
New stats revealed:
You have gained a level!
-Your deck has increased by two slots!
-You have gained an additional Mind slot!
As you come off your post victory high, you see several white spheres silently glowing where the Gremlin once stood, as well as two cards floating a few centimeters off the ground.
Investigate yonder cards and spheres. This is a video game, no? And every adventure RPG *always* has enemies dropping ARBITRARY CURRENCY and SWEET LOOT.
> Chester: Gather SWEET LOOT.
> Shit: Happen.
>Chester: Gather SWEET LOOT.
You stretch out a hand to examine the glowing spheres first. Almost at once, they gather in front of your outstretched palm and then vanish. There is the unmistakable sound of a cash register from above you, which you can't help but think is terribly cliche. You look up and are able to make out "+25 Pips" despite the odd angle. Letters float above your head for a moment before vanishing.
You then collect the two cards, examining them in your hands. The one in your right has a tan back and border with a "III" at the top, and its picture depicts a flask with some sort of green liquid in it. If your video game instincts are right, this is probably some sort of HEALING POTION.
The card in your right hand has a red colour, a "0" at the top, and interestingly enough depicts the Gremlin you just vanquished. Or a Gremlin, at least. You've only seen one, so you can't really tell.
With a thought, both cards vanish, presumably into your deck.