Forgotten Age

[Professor zobot]

>Zephyr: Wake

You are now Zephyr, an indeterminate amount of time in the future.



AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAEYE!

What? What happened! How long have you been out? You suddenly have no idea what's going on. The last thing you remember was the bright light, and then nothing but searing, agonizing pain flooding your mind. Where'd your new toy go? Did something happen? Are you under attack?

...where in Mafeas did your pants go?!?

This suggestion is so hilarious that I HAVE to support it.

In addition...

>Zephyr: After waking up with no pants, be seen by your superior officer (who is likely punch-drunk by now)

"Whoo, take it off!"



...is that some sort of image preservation artifact? You hope the Five Dragons are merciful enough for that not to be an image preservation artifact.

Besides, she wouldn't...



Of course she would. It was foolish of you to even consider otherwise.

Boxers of course. With nifty dragon design.

Um, Briefs. But I second the design.

I was assuming he would wear the old Japanese equivalent of underwear, essentially a sheet held up by faith, called a Fundoshi.

show spoiler

hide spoiler

Google-image searching that word reveals nothing but man-ass and helpful hints for tying a fundoshi. Also, Samurai Jack.

Locating a means of preserving your modesty has now become a priority.

[Cresent]

Heh heh heh... This seems to be getting amusing.

> Zephyr: Try to find your pants with all haste and ponder about your weird dream... Whilst being extremely embarassed due to the current situation.

> Sam: Appreciate the fact that Zeph is finally beginning to take it easy... And then remember that you STILL don't have a man of pleasing appearance to spend the night with. Thus, start hitting on Zeph.

[Wandering One]

What were we doing again? I think I've lost track...

>Zephyr: Attempt to access some sort of of status screen or something. Barring that, remind us of your current tasks.

...

>Also, find some pants. Anyone's pants. Now. Maybe Sam knows where yours went?

[Demothesis]

What were we doing again? I think I've lost track...

>Zephyr: Attempt to access some sort of of status screen or something. Barring that, remind us of your current tasks.

Your current priority is PANTS!

And possibly to find out if anyone knows anything about an ANATHEMA hiding in this town

But more immediately PANTS!

>Also, find some pants. Anyone's pants. Now. Maybe Sam knows where yours went?

You attempt to make conversation with Sam, but she only responds with innuendo!

It's as you feared. Your commanding officer is incapable of taking you even the slightest bit seriously while you are even partially unclothed. You aren't going to be getting anything useful out of her while there's nudity present.

> Sam: Appreciate the fact that Zeph is finally beginning to take it easy... And then remember that you STILL don't have a man of pleasing appearance to spend the night with. Thus, start hitting on Zeph.

S: You know, I bet with just a little tug I could get those things down without Zeph even noticing at all... Naah. It's less work to just let him embarrass himself.

Heh heh heh... This seems to be getting amusing.

> Zephyr: Try to find your pants with all haste and ponder about your weird dream... Whilst being extremely embarrassed due to the current situation.

...it was an odd dream, wasn't it? You've never dreamed about Sam or Stone before, much less any of the other things that went on. And that eye at the end...

You make a note to examine this more when you're sufficiently clothed. Now if only you could find some...



PANTS!



Your clothes. Give them to me!





Wait, what you meant was-



S: Right there. That's EXACTLY what I'm talking about.

You'd better think of a way to liberate these pants from an old seamstress before you lose whatever dignity you have left!

[OnBackorder]

Explain your noble task and how you are protecting her village. Such a lowly villager should be honored to help a hero such as you.

[Cresent]

> Zephyr: explain the situation and kindly request the usage of those pants. When you are fully clothed again, get to answering Sam's likely innuendo-laced comments. Venomously. Oh, and try to bargain with her to get rid of the image in her picture-capturing artifact if possible.

[Wandering One]

>Zephyr: Um... USE WIND POWERS TO MAKE A DISTRACTING FOG AND ESCAPE WITH YOUR NEW PANTS!

[Professor zobot]

> Zephyr: explain the situation and kindly request the usage of those pants.

Amazingly enough, this works! You've managed to obtain a replacement set of pants!

When you are fully clothed again, get to answering Sam's likely innuendo-laced comments. Venomously. Oh, and try to bargain with her to get rid of the image in her picture-capturing artifact if possible.

show spoiler

hide spoiler

Z: I don't suppose there's any way I could convince you to-

S: Malfeas would empty itself first, Harem boy.

Z: ...you're not going to stop calling me that, are you.

S: What else should I call a male who parades around in his underthings?

Z: You stole my original pair, didn't you.

S: If I had I'd be wearing them right now as a trophy. Whoever DID, though, deserves some sort of trophy for it!

Meanwhile...



This trophy is just a taste of the vengeance to come, Dragon Disciple!

But back to matters of importance...

show spoiler

hide spoiler

Z: So you had absolutely nothing to do with the loss of my pants?

S: Harem boy, for the last time, I have no idea who took your effing pants! I don't steal, Zeph. Now where's that man I told you to find!

Z: I wasn't going to find you a man in the first place! It was a stupid order and I'm not going to-

S: Well, I suppose I could just pick you. You're a bit too virgin for my tastes, but I suppose given proper tutelage...

Z: I'm not- Look, we need to focus on the mission!

S: That's what I'm trying to get you to do, harem boy!

Z: You... ARRGH!

You've really had it with today.



At least your unexpected nap had some benefits. You've regained a small fraction of your spiritual energy back.

Still...



You've absolutely had it. This day has simply been one frusteration after another, a neverending crescendo of inane events that seem only to make your mood worse. You don't understand your Astrologer's insistance on remaining in this pointless little place and your Lady Commander is only using it as an excuse to wallow in whatever hedonistic impulses she can act on. You can't see any point in staying here and there's got to be-



...wait, what?

Ah! That can only be the anathma! ...What was it the hunt called him again? Dangit, no time to worry about that, it'll come to you.

show spoiler

hide spoiler

Bit of a cliffhanger update here! What's going on?

Next update soon, we had a bit of a delay due to tests for grad school impeding one of the two of us.

Sorry for using only one command this time around, but I guarentee you after next update your commands will be very VERY important...

[Torquemadras Trump]

> BE IN AWE. Whoever that is, you are immediately enarmored by that voice!

[Wandering One]

Eee!

Soil Spinner: Post Pants on Post as example to other garments that side with the Dragon Disciple!

Gold-Text Guy: Speech! Speech!

[OnBackorder]

Those villagers look like drones, as if the talker is stealing their very souls.

Zephyr: Might as well take a listen. Also there is a pot you can shatter behind you.

[Cresent]

> Zephyr: Clearly, something wicked is going on here! Finally, you have a chance to do something meaningful! Push your way through the crowd and shut the speaker up with booming declaration of "STOP RIGHT THERE, ANATHEMA SCUM!"

[Demothesis]

Zephyr: Might as well take a listen. Also there is a pot you can shatter behind you.

> BE IN AWE. Whoever that is, you are immediately enarmored by that voice!

You don't necessarily have a choice in the matter. The second after those words hit your ears, they wrapped their insidious syllables around your mind. A bizarre sort of power filled those words, overwhelming the discipline of your mind and compelling you, despite any inclination to the contrary, to stop and listen to what he has to say. You have just one chance to act as you feel your mind falling under his sway, which you use to do the most logical thing ever.

Pots destroyed: 6 of 87

Gold-Text Guy: Speech! Speech!

There was a time...

Long ago in this very land there was an Age.

An age where Tornados were theater, gods had goals, disease in decline, and people knew purpose. And in this Forgotten Age mankind, united under the Children of the Sun, venerated the gods in service of the Stars, the Moon, and the Sun, and in deference to heaven's mandate lived in peace.

That peace has been lost. You all know the stories. The Children of the Sun were struck from the sky. I am not here to give you a sermon.

But now, in this time of trials, where wantless wars wage and petty gods demand veneration just to fulfil their appointed duties, we all want for answers... Answers that I shall freely give to you, if I myself know them.

But I am not here to rule over any of you! That is not my burden to carry. But if you stay a while, and listen, I can teach you to recover a small fragment of that Forgotten Age's glory. And perhaps use it to better the lives of those around you as well. What say you all?

Those villagers look like drones, as if the talker is stealing their very souls.

> Zephyr: Clearly, something wicked is going on here! Finally, you have a chance to do something meaningful!

Fortunately, a trained DRAGON DISCIPLE shakes off such effects quite easily!

> Zephyr: Push your way through the crowd and shut the speaker up with booming declaration

STOP RIGHT THERE, ANATHEMA SCUM!

show spoiler

hide spoiler

I've been waiting for this moment for months! Showdown time! What will Zephyr do?

[Cresent]

Alright, it is showtime.

> Zephyr: Make a signal you obviously agreed upon with the rest of the hunt before arriving to call them in. After that, draw your weapons and get to anathema-killing. Respond to any pleads or arguments made by the enemy with "you are anathema, and therefore must die!"

> Speechy solar: be frustrated to no end that the windy guy does not listen and be forced to actually fight with him. Never stop trying to convince him to tell you what has gotten him so angry, though. Maybe you can help him!

> Sam: Arrive and be actually impressed that Zeph is managing to hold his own. Maybe he is not a total clown after all.

[OnBackorder]

That's a nice, fine book he has there. It should be Zephyr's first target.

[Vancho1]

show spoiler

hide spoiler

Zeph:

Activate your secret fighting technique: Hurricane Rap. The better rhymes you make, the more powerful the storm!

Gold-Text Guy:

Reveal... ANTI-RAP FIELD!

Zeph: Vent your anger, and interrupt the gold-text guy whenever he starts talking. You can't let more of his words affect these poor people.

[Wandering One]

... I just realized we don't really know what Zephyr can DO. We should really figure that out...

Zephyr: Use windy power to throw seeking Chakrams at him! Then elaborate on what else you can do!

[Torquemadras Trump]

> Zephyr: Take the stage and challenge gold guy! Let's see how he reacts to THAT!

> Crowd: Boo windy guy immediately.

[Wandering One]

This is still going, right?

>Zephyr: Consider NOT attacking this guy and just listening to what he has to say?

[Cresent]

I really hope that this is still going on... it has been fun thus far

[Professor zobot]

Hey guys!

Yes, this isn't dead. The unfortunate truth, however, is that neither Demo nor I have had a ton of time lately to work on it. Forgotten Age WILL return, however!

Never fear, expect something interlude-ish coming soon!

[Vanilla-Shaken]

Diplomacy first...if you can of course.

[Professor zobot]

Ok, an explanation is clearly needed.

Mainly due to the unexplained hiatus. There's been some complications that have prevented us from working on this project, both on my end and that of our Artist, Demothesis. I'm not going to go into details, but suffice to say real world concerns have left both of us with little time to work on this. Forgotten Age is NOT dead, however, and we will be making a triumphant comeback soon. I've dealt with my real life issues and Demothesis is handling his.

But until then, starting next week, we will be doing something a little bit different... specifically, a bit of a sidestory of sorts. What sort of sidestory? I'm glad you asked...

Please vote for what you'd like to see out of the three choices below. The choice that receives the most votes will be started on next week and run until we're able to pick things back up proper then. (Note: The sidestory will be drawn-ish by me rather than Demothesis, so no guarantees will be made of quality. Our apologies)

Options:

1) A First Person Account of the Liberation of the World

2) Of Pigs and Dragons

3) The Story of the Slain

Thank you and goodnight!

[Torquemadras Trump]

OF PIGS AND DRAGONS!

There's dragons in it, so I'm pretty much bound by contract to vote for that one.

But the pigs are also great.

[OnBackorder]

Is The Story of the Slain a horror story?

I vote that.