>AGGRIEVE or FLEE before they take up formation again.
>AGGRIEVE or FLEE before they take up formation again.
Can't draw. Can't plot. Can bullshiz a little.
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Tvtropes Migrant. be advised.
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I am forced to use the greatest surgical instrument of all: insanity!
Wet guards
With metal armor
Versus a sword
That is not only Ancient Tech
But also electric
It's like Christmas if instead of getting presents you beat the shit out of people
So no different for Gwydian I guess
Legend of the Hunter - 23
NOW is the time to flee. The guards are alarmed, but still in disarray- you might still make it...
But too late. HERE THEY COME!
Finally, a battle!
I was waiting for a chance to punch those stupid helmets
and all the heads in 'em
I call it SupleX-Mas
You engage BATTLE MODE! A couple of soaked, but determined guards bar your way, grimly waving their swords and shivering a little. It might pay off to play the waiting game until your enemies are RAVAGED BY THE FLU, but you're on the tight schedule of TRYING TO MINIMIZE WIDESPREAD DESTRUCTION.
Maybe it is not too late to try some diplomacy.
With some ARCS OF LIGHTNING to back up your argument.
The awe-inspiring sword of lightning ALASTOR unleashes a wave of crackling energy. Thanks to your sword skills, you can hold back the magical energy - you're JUST THAT GOOD.
At least the creators of Alastor had the foresight to protect its wielder against its own electricity! Though not enough foresight to keep it from STABBING YOU AS A GREETING.
With a little pain as a reminder of who they're dealing with, you shout to the guards: Let us go! We were caught up in this ENTIRELY UNRELATED ACCIDENT! Or do we look like common thieves to you?!
Whelp
There goes the bluff.
Wasn't that good anyway
Gwydian immediately charges towards the commander of the guards, spouting various snide comments about CENTERS OF GRAVITY and CAUSES OF FAMINE. But the commander is ready. This will be a titanic battle, causing untold destruction all over the place. You wanted to avoid this, but it was not to be. Hopefully, no innocents will be drawn into this -
No, wait, stop this meaningless violence!
You need not struggle against each other!
This is a horrible misunderstanding!
What? Who's that priest? How did this crowd manage to sneak up on you this fast? What is that priest babbling about? And -
Oh by the gods
Gwydian why aren't you stopping
==>
Gwydian: Use priest's head as a springboard!
Gwiddy: KNow the priest. He owes you booze!
Hey look, it's a wild Signature!
Legend of the Hunter - 24
The priests is flailing about with those noodly arms of his. It won't do him much good - Gwydian's going to either swat him out of the way or USE HIM AS A WEAPON.
Hell yeah
Why didn't I think of that
No. NO NO NO. Gwydian, you yell, don't punch the priest!
DON'T PUNCH THE PRIEST
DON'T PUNCH THE PRIEST
DON'T PUNCH THE PRIEST GWYDIAN
DON'T PUNCH THE PRIEST
DON'T PUNCH THE PRIEST
DON'T PUNCH THE PRIEST
DON'T PUNCH THE PRIEST
DON'T PUNCH THE PRIEST
DON'T PUNCH THE FUCKING PRIEST GWYDIAN
God fine you incessantly nagging pious motherfucker
I'm not gonna PUNCH you
But you so fucking owe me some world-class booze for that
Hehe now he does
This is the kind of planning ahead that I like
The priest, while shocked, is also greatly relieved that your brother stopped JUST IN TIME. Now no longer facing imminent danger of WEAPONIZATION, he begins to explain just why he thought interrupting this fight was a good idea.
Phew! I was slightly unsettled, there.
I thought you might actually partake in serious aggravation!
How silly of me!
Erm - as I- as I said - this is a horrible misunderstanding, dear guard commander.
Because these two gentlemen had every right to be in that dungeon,
and whatever they may be accused of,
I'm sure they'll present plenty of reason for that soon.
You see,
the good sir with the magical sword back there
is actually the exorcist that King Skal himself asked for!
You are pretty sure THAT IS NOT ACTUALLY THE CASE.
==>
Yup. It was haunted by the mummy cat. And then you made it worse by turning it into a lich~
Nice going, Sebastian~ ~◕ w◕~
roll with it like a dead dog on a steep hill
Seb: ROLL WITH IT. This is obviously Plot important.
Gwiddy: The fuck else can you punch.
Hey look, it's a wild Signature!
Seb> roll with it all the way to the bank
Gwydian> go grab your loot bag EXORCIST BAG and put all the Loot EXORCIST TOOLS back in it
Gwyddy : Fist bump the priest. You two are bros now.
Priest> actually believe these two are exorcists, and send them to fight a horrifying undead creature.
Legend of the Hunter - 25
Why, yes, OF COURSE, are the words of confirmation that will not only get you out of this situation, but also lots of sweet, sweet LOOT. You try your best smile and... shake hands?
Apparently, this priest wants to SHAKE HANDS.
Don't mind me, fine gentlemen
Just packin' my things
All the things
All the glittering, invaluable, magical and awesome things
All of 'em
Jup
Being legal all over the place here
I think your Alastor swordie wants attention
You try your best to remain absolutely confident in whatever the hell an exorcist is supposed to do. You immediately apologize that you did not immediately NOTIFY THE AUTHORITIES, for, you see, there was trouble with a train and a BARTENDER, so, uh, sorry for the exploded dungeon, you guess?
The priest is more than happy to hear that. Or HE DIDN'T ACTUALLY LISTEN. In any case, he exclaims that he just knew the long-overdue exorcist had finally arrived the moment he saw that shiny armor of yours - only the exorcists wear those!
At least, you know now who that DEAD GUY IN THE MOUNTAINS was.
Impersonate the DEAD EXORCIST WHOSE IDENTITY YOU JUST ASSUMED DUE TO STRANGE CIRCUMSTANCES, in order to investigate the ULTIMATE WEAPON with impunity and scrounge lots of powerful artifacts to boot?
NO. Sebastian would never do such a thing.
HIERONYMUS AND SALVADORE SLICK, on the other hand...
Heeeeeyyyyy
Yes yes of course we're the missing exorcists
I mean
He is
I'm, like, his awesome bodyguard
You're cool, is what I'm saying
Com'on man FISTBUMP DO IT
Oh no, Father Lamard!
Don't you EVER listen to me?!
We went over this! Communicating with today's youth is fine!
IMITATING THEIR RITES IS NOT!
A young woman appears, obviously unfazed by the Drakenguards kicking their heels. She particularly ignores the MENACING PRESENCE that is supposed to be TRISTAN. Poor, poor Tristan. He seems quite unsure how to approach the situation WITHOUT CHAIRS BEING FLAILED ABOUT SOON THEREAFTER.
I can do high-fives too!
Ah, yes... Erm... Oh!
How very impolite of me, I didn't introduce myself...
I am Father Lamard, head of the local temple to the Grand Dragon.
And this is one of the Dragon Maidens, our dear Ava!
Uh, nice, nice to meet you, mister exorcist!
The guard commander stays suspicious. While the lowering of the axe is definitely a GOOD SIGN, he insists on having to inform his higher-ups. He'll let you two go - EVEN YOU, GREASY-HAIRED PUNK, THOSE 'JOKES' WEREN'T FUNNY AT ALL! - but you will have to report to the GENERAL, too. After all, he was supposed to greet you. Maybe you can explain to him why you were BLOWING UP DUNGEONS.
Father Lamard assures you that those formalities won't be a problem. More importantly, the demon THAT IS REPORTEDLY HEADED TOWARDS THE CITY must be stopped! But with your trusty EXORCIST RITES, repelling the beast while the festival is going on should be easy, right?
You HESITATE. Well, you have a demon-destroying punch and, due to your history with the SILVER KNIGHTS, know a thing or two about warding against demons. But actual exorcist magic might put a strain on this bluff... if you don't abscond before then, of course.
Also, you tell Ava, don't take this the wrong way, but there's a MAGICAL LIGHTNING SWORD BEHIND YOU THAT WILL START STABBING ANY MOMENT.
==>
"Hiernoymus": GET YOUR SWORD BEFORE IT HURTS PEOPLE.
"Salvadore": IS THAT A CRANE. OH MY GOD. I HAVEN'T USED A CRANE AS A WEAPON BEFORE I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
Ava: Be WAY more weird than you seem, but still likable.
Hey look, it's a wild Signature!
Gwyddi> wear the lich-cat Seb made and you subsequently made friends with as a hat, then go grab that crane like ZenFeline said.
Seb> ask Father Lamard for more information about this demon.
Ava> turn out to literally be a dragon maiden, as in half dragon.