Moronis's Achievements In Life:
Once A Man: Scream "COBRAAAAAAA!" during highschool graduation.
Swear to god, it was this big!: Help construct a four foot tall paper dinosaur.
Infosponge: Pass an end of course exam with flying colors despite having slept through the entire class all year long.
Dwarven Virus: Convince a large number of people to play Dwarf Fortress on school laptops.
The Perfect Crime: No one is turned in for doing the above.
First Step In A Cybermile: Program an incredibly shitty platformer for Senior Project.
Badjoke Knight: Tell a large number of bad jokes (in excess of 100)
You Did What?: Dress as, no joke, a Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot for Halloween one year.
Who Ordered The Glazed Ham?: For a reading of The Crucible, proceed to ham it up so spectacularly, you earn extra credit to keep doing it.
I Also Have This Block Of Cheese: For an Extra Credit Assignment, proceed to ham it up for the 1950's style broadcast you and several others are doing.
Oh, And This Loaf Of Bread: Proceed to convince everyone to dress in period appropriate clothing for the hell of it.
And that's all I've done to my memory. I'll post again if I remember more.