MSPA Fan Music 2: Now In Cut Time

[AlphaKnight]

heres some stuff for yall to listen to

[VeritasUnae]

I wrote a song about Homestuck, too. It's called "Light and Rain". I posted a crappy bleep-bloop version of it here about a year ago, but I was never too satisfied with it. Anyway, I just finished a series of studio sessions to make it into an actual song! Vocals and bass by me; guitars, drums, and production by Stephen Childs of Musically Speaking.

The opening chords seem really detached from each other, but not in a way that seems like they were done on purpose. That section plays better later.
I also echo Kyn's sentiments re-vocals. I would also like to say that it's really lacking in diction so I really wouldn't have understood the lyrics without them being there. But that's not a fault of just you. So many people do the same thing.

[Combiner8761]

Hello people, I am newly registred, as you can see, and the only reason I did was because I wanted to share a piece of music with you. I actually discovered this months ago, but I figure that you must've found it months earlier than I. Nevertheless, a quick google search revealed nothing of the sort, and therefore I've decided to post this.

You see, I've noticed that the track Versus from Homestuck 5 is awesome, but packed with an onslought with seemingly random notes. Well, I've slowed down versus to a fifth of it's original speed and, well, it turns out those notes aren't so random after all.

It's like it has become a completely different piece, and is actually kind of awe-worthy. The major highlights are 3:25 and 6:20.

I've actually done some remixes, but since I'm not as skilled as you are, I mostly used Paulstretch.

I want to note that I actually discovered this accidentally, and the first song I created was actually a slight remix rather than just a slowdown.

It's a bit slower, but I just thinks that adds to the effect. To this day I prefer "Time's conundrum" to any other results from toying around with the song.

[ombrophilia]

The main problem I heard was that, sometimes in the chorus, it seemed like the vocals were out of tune with the rhythm parts.
Otherwise, nice job.

Thanks! That's likely my producer's fault. He went a little crazy with the Melodyne, changing some of my pitches up (but smacking nobody up, which is gracious). I probably could've gone through it with a fine-toothed comb, but that would've cost money that I don't really have right now.

The opening chords seem really detached from each other, but not in a way that seems like they were done on purpose. That section plays better later.
I also echo Kyn's sentiments re-vocals. I would also like to say that it's really lacking in diction so I really wouldn't have understood the lyrics without them being there. But that's not a fault of just you. So many people do the same thing.

So that section works better with an underlying beat, you're saying? I'll keep it in mind. What parts are diction-challenged the most? Just so I can know for later. I can understand everything fine, but that's obviously because it's my voice.

[UNDERWATER BASKETWEAVING]

Awesome remix. And darn, I had that same idea for the Doctor chord progression. Mine was for more of an EDM style song, but nevertheless, beat me to the punch.

I didn't even realize that having ideas for chord progressions counted as a thing!
God, I am so lacking in music theory it actually physically hurts me.

[DoubleJoeSeven]

I didn't even realize that having ideas for chord progressions counted as a thing!
God, I am so lacking in music theory it actually physically hurts me.

I'm in the same boat...er...basket, as you. My knowledge of music theory is like, 2%.

[Well Manicured Man]

Before I found out about http://www.musictheory.net/ I literally only knew 3 chords (four if you count V7), although I was pretty much using ii chords even though I didn't formally know what they were. It wasn't until I bought "The Complete Idiot's Guide to Composing" that I "figured out" chord progressions, and that was only because I found the website's lesson on circle progression kind of hard to follow. If you listen to enough music the rules will sort of become ingrained in your subconscious, but having more formal knowledge is always a boon and, well, the tools are out there.

Also,

Imperial Forces

[VeritasUnae]

So that section works better with an underlying beat, you're saying? I'll keep it in mind. What parts are diction-challenged the most? Just so I can know for later. I can understand everything fine, but that's obviously because it's my voice.

I'd have to relisten. I'm pretty sure it was just the verses seemed a little less pronounced, but I can't personally recall right now, and I'm in a practical so I can't really listen. But I'll get on it when I can.

[Kyntello]

Messing with dissonance is fun.

I'm kinda worried by the end, though.
Hatred/Reference Get/Critique/Comment please?

[Rnd]

heres some stuff for yall to listen to

Nice. DECIMATION is nice and smooth. It flows nicely, and has a nice set of sounds. It's like pouring honey down my ears. It reminds me of something that might be played during a strife with a guardian or a lusus or something. Awesome. The only suggestion I'd offer is to add some more background instruments to the arrangement. I know techno is generally a bit more repetitive, and it definitely works without, but I think just adding some subtle background instruments would be a nice touch.

I'd say much the same for ANIMATION, but I like it even better. I like the slower pace and the intricate array of instruments. The pitch bends are a nice touch. It's very polished. Not much else to say on the matter. I think it has the right balance between doing the same thing and adding new segments and instruments to the mix.

Space-Time Continuous... Awesome remix. Love it. Explore is one of my favorite Homestuck songs, and in some ways I like this remix better. It's true to the original, but adds it's own flair and interpretation to the song. I'd say this is the best out of the three. I could listen to it all day.

And now I'm going to have it stuck in my head all day, too. Kudos.

[AlphaKnight]

woah, thanks for critiquing all of them! I'll see about changing what you suggested

[Rnd]

woah, thanks for critiquing all of them! I'll see about changing what you suggested

Sorry if that kinda came out of nowhere. It occurred to me after I posted that you didn't actually ask for critique. :/

[AlphaKnight]

no! I really like when people critique, i just forget to ask

[Rnd]

Something I've been working on lately.

It was inspired by Black Rose, Green Sun, as if that wasn't painfully obvious from listening to it (it's not a remix, though).

There are a few things I'm worried about concerning this song. Mainly, I think it's too long, but I don't really know what would be best to cut out. Also, I think it gets a bit repetitive at parts, but I think removing the repetition might damage the song's flow. So I'm at kind of an impasse here. I'd like some outside opinions.

Thoughts/comments/critiques would be appreciated (especially that last one).

[VeritasUnae]

The opening is really divided, there's no sense of unity there. I find that it seems like a little... random and not really connected. The parts should really flow together, in a similar way towards a common goal. It gets a little better later.

Another big problem I have is with the sounds you're using. The violin really needs to be more legato, and reach the notes a little fast, rather than crescendo towards them. A lot of the other instruments are falling short. Primarily the crash, it's a little too much like a bad drum kit crash cymbal when you really want concert crash cymbals (and i'd also use the cymbals a little less).

Around 2:04~ the bell part is dissonant to the rest of the piece. Not sure if that was intentional because there never seems to be any resolution of it, it just continues to play dissonant melodies to the strings.

I think the main problem is thematically there's no real development. Perhaps try moving the melody through some more instruments, changing keys, changing style, something to break up the similarity of the piece. It's all quavers continuously moving to long notes, and then repeat, to me. Cut some of the parts where it sounds the same as earlier, would be what I would suggest. As there's no real flow at the moment that I feel, I don't think it'd be damaging it, and ultimately if the flow is into a section that sounds so very similar as earlier, it's more boring than well-flowing.

But those are my suggestions. It's not bad, but I feel that it really suffers from repetition and length, like you say, as well as some of that dissonance.

[DoubleJoeSeven]

Here is what I did this weekend!

"Electrocumulus" is a remix of Skaian Skirmish/Pyrocumulus.
This is my first "real" remix of a Homestuck song. How'd I do?

Hey everyone. I posted this a week ago and I was wondering if I could get some feedback on it. It'd be much appreciated!

Also, here is a fantheme I am working on for someone.
I guess feedback on this track would be cool too! Thanks!

I'll try to get back into this whole section of the forum again and actually try to contribute something, don't you people worry!

[AlphaKnight]

Something I've been working on lately.

It was inspired by Black Rose, Green Sun, as if that wasn't painfully obvious from listening to it (it's not a remix, though).

There are a few things I'm worried about concerning this song. Mainly, I think it's too long, but I don't really know what would be best to cut out. Also, I think it gets a bit repetitive at parts, but I think removing the repetition might damage the song's flow. So I'm at kind of an impasse here. I'd like some outside opinions.

Thoughts/comments/critiques would be appreciated (especially that last one).

*returns favor*
i rather like it at around 1:58, but before that its a little broken up. I'd suggest some more sustain in one of the leads, i think veritas probably has a better idea what it needs though. i like the bells at 3:20 a lot, maybe fit more of that in there somewhere.
the cymbal crashes are kind of annoying to me. sustain might help that too. adding more percussion crashes during them might also benefit.
its also pretty long. hitting the 6 minute mark now with plenty to go. the whole thing could be formatted to 4 and 1/3 minutes pretty well.

Hey everyone. I posted this a week ago and I was wondering if I could get some feedback on it. It'd be much appreciated!

Also, here is a fantheme I am working on for someone.
I guess feedback on this track would be cool too! Thanks!

I'll try to get back into this whole section of the forum again and actually try to contribute something, don't you people worry!

damn. im not sure i have much to say on this. theres a weird ringing durring the first section thats probably caused by one of the backing instruments. it bugs me and this is such a good piece otherwise so it bugs me even more than usual.
about 3/4s in theres a cut off and a sine, id give the sine more time and bring the drums in a few seconds later. the last quarter's drums are also kind of messy. if you were using grossbeat for it id try different gross beat channels

[Rnd]

The opening is really divided, there's no sense of unity there. I find that it seems like a little... random and not really connected. The parts should really flow together, in a similar way towards a common goal. It gets a little better later.

Another big problem I have is with the sounds you're using. The violin really needs to be more legato, and reach the notes a little fast, rather than crescendo towards them. A lot of the other instruments are falling short. Primarily the crash, it's a little too much like a bad drum kit crash cymbal when you really want concert crash cymbals (and i'd also use the cymbals a little less).

Around 2:04~ the bell part is dissonant to the rest of the piece. Not sure if that was intentional because there never seems to be any resolution of it, it just continues to play dissonant melodies to the strings.

I think the main problem is thematically there's no real development. Perhaps try moving the melody through some more instruments, changing keys, changing style, something to break up the similarity of the piece. It's all quavers continuously moving to long notes, and then repeat, to me. Cut some of the parts where it sounds the same as earlier, would be what I would suggest. As there's no real flow at the moment that I feel, I don't think it'd be damaging it, and ultimately if the flow is into a section that sounds so very similar as earlier, it's more boring than well-flowing.

But those are my suggestions. It's not bad, but I feel that it really suffers from repetition and length, like you say, as well as some of that dissonance.

No, I rather appreciate suggestions. I'm sure it goes without saying that I'm new at composing, and, unfortunately, no one that I know can really give me good critique, and that's kind of frustrating. So thank you.

Yes, the dissonance was intentional, but I'm realizing more and more that I have no subtlety when it comes to dissonance, so I'll resolve it/change it/remove it depending on how it works out in the end once I reformat the song. I'll also mess with the sounds a bit more to make them less grating/annoying.

Thanks again, and sorry for subjecting you to my noobishness. Next draft will be at least marginally better, I promise.

[VeritasUnae]

It's okay.
We were all noobs at some point.
And I still continue to be, in my mind. I have much to learn about composition.

[DoubleJoeSeven]

damn. im not sure i have much to say on this. theres a weird ringing durring the first section thats probably caused by one of the backing instruments. it bugs me and this is such a good piece otherwise so it bugs me even more than usual.
about 3/4s in theres a cut off and a sine, id give the sine more time and bring the drums in a few seconds later. the last quarter's drums are also kind of messy. if you were using grossbeat for it id try different gross beat channels

Alright, thanks for the feedback! The ringing is an bell/chime instrument, I can try to tune it down a bit, but it is purposeful. I can fix the drums as well. I think I may have accidentally overlapped a drum loop. Thanks again!



Here is a fantheme I completed today, the one from my previous post. Idk if this counts as Homestuck music, but oh well.

[Atarlost]

Something I've been working on lately.

It was inspired by Black Rose, Green Sun, as if that wasn't painfully obvious from listening to it (it's not a remix, though).

There are a few things I'm worried about concerning this song. Mainly, I think it's too long, but I don't really know what would be best to cut out. Also, I think it gets a bit repetitive at parts, but I think removing the repetition might damage the song's flow. So I'm at kind of an impasse here. I'd like some outside opinions.

Thoughts/comments/critiques would be appreciated (especially that last one).

I quite like it as is. I think perhaps I like long repetitive instrumental pieces more than most though.

I know, not the most helpful of comments when you've already decided there's something wrong with it, but there you have it.

[Rnd]

No, I rather appreciate suggestions. I'm sure it goes without saying that I'm new at composing, and, unfortunately, no one that I know can really give me good critique, and that's kind of frustrating. So thank you.

Yes, the dissonance was intentional, but I'm realizing more and more that I have no subtlety when it comes to dissonance, so I'll resolve it/change it/remove it depending on how it works out in the end once I reformat the song. I'll also mess with the sounds a bit more to make them less grating/annoying.

Thanks again, and sorry for subjecting you to my noobishness. Next draft will be at least marginally better, I promise.

...And the new version is marginally better.

But only marginally.

Barring making the strings perfectly legato (I fixed most of the song, but there are a few spots where no matter what I do it seems to crescendo too much), I think I fixed most of the problems with the original song. But it's far from perfect.

I've gotten to the point though where any improvements I try to make make it worse in some way, so I'm finishing up this version. I'm going to make another version at some point, and I have my own ideas about what needs fixing, but I'd like to hear other people's opinions about it too.

I would appreciate critique. I tried to fix the issues brought up, so let me know if I didn't do enough/went too far.

I'm terrible at expressing myself, so I guess what I'm trying to say is I think I've made this piece as good as I can possibly make it (without completely rewriting it again, and I intend to at some point). I don't have the composition or mixing skills to really make it shine like I want it to. I'd like some feedback on this so I can get closer to doing so in the future.

[VeritasUnae]

It's definitely improved. Still feels a little repetitive, but I like the some of the dissonance that's there.
It just seems to lack direction. There's no building to something, no ebb nor flow; pretty straight forward and consistent.
Maybe take out one repetitive section and replace it with a more dramatic section that contrasts.
That's just a suggestion, again, and there are many other ways you can play with the flow of the piece.

[SandvichParty]

I made something inspired by Upwards Movement (Dave Owns), though I posted it in the wrong thread at first >_> <_<
Anyways here.

[ShieruKouto]

I mixed this together fairly quickly in Reason, starting with the arpeggios from Candles and Clockwork and the melody of SBurban Jungle.
Considering it took only about an hour, I'm quite proud of it.