Blasted - Intermission

[snuffysam]

NOTE TO NEW READERS!

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Yeah, so this looks like your regular Sburb-venture huh? Well, it isn't. Kind of. Honestly, you don't get to any Sburb stuff until Act 2, which is about 25 (forum) pages in. We get sidetracked REAL easy. Plus, once we actually get to the Sburb stuff, there's all these... well, let's just call them "shocks". This ain't no ordinary Sburb game, and I intend to keep it that way.
Thanks for contributing!

Your name is EDWARD TOMAS. You live in a two-story gray house in a small suburban neighborhood. You have very few intrests, but one of the ones you are most passionate about is SPYING. You love spying on your next-door neighbor, whom you hate. You also sometimes play RPG games, such as Quest of Minestar, which does not at all break 12 copyrights. Your DAD is a VIDEO GAME DESIGNER, which enables you to get many games before they come out. What will you do?

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MIRROR

MUSIC:

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MAP:

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(All links lead to the Mirror pages)

FANART:

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By Godu-kun

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TUMBLR

[Majolica]

> Admit you've used your spying prowess on someone other than your neighbour. Someone hot and female, probably.

[snuffysam]

> Admit you've used your spying prowess on someone other than your neighbour. Someone hot and female, probably.

The only window in your room is pointed directly at your neighbor's upstairs window, and there are no females living in his house, hot or otherwise. The only one remotely hot or female in your neighborhood lives in a huge mansion down the street, and her house is so big that you do not have nearly enough microscopic cameras to even cover the bathroom! Besides, your neighbor is doing something suspicious that is much more important than any hot female.

Although, you will admit that you were able to place spy cameras in the houses of your internet friends. Just in case they do something suspicious or something.

However, at the moment, the only suspicious person you've seen is your stupid neighbor. He's planning something big, and you need to find out what.

[Gimeurcookie]

> Spy on neighbor one more time before downloading the game on your table.

[snuffysam]

> Spy on neighbor one more time before downloading the game on your table.

You climb the ladder and look out the window at your neighbor's.
But you cannot see all the way up to his second story window, even if yours is slanted at the perfect angle to see him. To you, he looks like a blurry mess. This is probably because you aren't looking through one of the many Vision Assisters you have located on your shelves and in your closet. However, you can still see his general form, and it looks like he's looking straight at you. This is impossible, as you installed an illusionifier that makes your window look like part of the roof from outside. Perhaps he's looking at a cat.

As for installing the game on your table...

(sorry about the image problems, don't know why that's happening)
No, you don't think you will!
Your dad got this game for you before it was officially released, and he told you about its features. And you hate it! Honestly, who would want someone snooping around in their room, looking at all their private things? Not you! And all this "Alchemy" stuff... It seems a bit too complicated for you. And saving the universe in real life? You'd rather play something safer, like Quest of Minestar, traversing the galaxy and killing aliens with a pickaxe.
Not even your internet friends can convince you to play this game, and you are planning on destroying it as soon as possible.

[GuAndrade]

>Play the daumn game.

[snuffysam]

>Play the daumn game
You consider this.

WHOOPSIE SPLASHY! (tee hee)

[Gimeurcookie]

> Go play that other game.

[snuffysam]

> Go play that other game.

You play Quest of Minestar, one of your favorite games, despite the bad graphics. You play as a miner who gets drafted in the Space Army to fight against the aliens. Along the way you can find different people, creatures, and items. You just recently died and re-spawned, so your inventory is quite small. You have your Pickaxe and a Dragon Egg, which you are protecting for the Dragon Mother following you around. You had a stone wall in your inventory, but you deployed it for the fight against this boss. This boss is the Gurgle Slimeonator, and he shoots slime-balls for his attack. Luckily, your stone wall absorbs such things. The Dragon is helping you fight, which would be good if the Gurgle Slimeonator wasn't dodgeing every attack thrown at it anyways.

This is incredibly fun!

You can't wait for this game to actually be released to the public, so that you can play online mode with your many internet friends.

[FIDUSPAWN]

>Have a meteor fall on your house sooner than it suppose to for not playing that game.

[snuffysam]

>Have a meteor fall on your house sooner than it suppose to for not playing that game.

A meteor falls on the MAKESHIFT HUT you built when you realized a game-week ago that the military had stranded you on this planet. You wish you had decided to play that stupid mind game one of the men living in that MANSION nearby wanted to do. If you had, he probably would have given you his father's SILVER EGG, which has the power to multiply the main source of fuel for your MAKESHIFT ROCKET indefinately. With it, you would have finally been able to escape this stupid planet. But no, you had to blatantly refuse to stare into his eyes, didn't you? You were always so stubborn about these things. Luckily the SHOCKWAVE hasn't destroyed your ROCKET. That won't happen for another 5 hours. You still have time to go back to that MANSION and get out of here.

Unless you were thinking about the real world, in which case you have no idea why that would happen! Your dad told you many things about this game when he gave you it 2 and a half weeks ago, and one of the things he told you is that the meteor in your area won't start until the countdown starts. You're certain nobody has entered the game yet, as the beta isn't even released to the public for another...

Oh.

Maybe you should check the houses in your area.

[FIDUSPAWN]

>Start checking the houses in your area to see if the meteors have struck them yet.

[P_equals_NP]

>Don't check, remain negligent of your well-being. Go eat some sugary foods and get diabetes (now).

[snuffysam]

>Start checking the houses in your area to see if the meteors have struck them yet.
(too lazy to animate this, sorry)

You minimize Quest of Minestar and open up SpyCam Delux. Through the tiny camera you placed on a cell phone sattelite, you can see your city clearly. Nothing from your house to Cavity Mansion and any of the colorless houses in between have been struck. However, when you look at the view through your cameras strategically placed on the International Space Station and the Hubble Space Telescope, you see the same meteor from different viewpoints headed for roughly your neighborhood. You probably should find whoever started this session and do something about this.

Also, one of your viewscreens is all static-y. You can't remember where the camera was. Oh, well.

[FIDUSPAWN]

>Search for the missing camera since it sounds too important to lose.

[Gimeurcookie]

> Well you better just put that game disc in and get this over with.

[snuffysam]

>Search for the missing camera since it sounds too important to lose.

Wait... You think you see something on the moon...
Upon closer inspection, it seems the camera you placed on top of the flagpole has a broken antenna. These cameras cost $2 at the dollar store, a fact which you have never really comprehended. It doesn't seem nessessary to get the camera back, especially since it would cost you less to slingshot a new one on top of the old one than to fix the old one.
Unfortunately, you are out of cameras! You will go to the store and buy one as soon as you figure out who in your neighborhood is playing Sburb.
Also, you notice some idiot has grafitied the flag! How rude!
19/20 CAMERAS FUNCTIONING

> Well you better just put that game disc in and get this over with.
You have flushed the game down the toilet! There's no way you're playing it, especially since you don't want to. You're going to have to think of some other way to escape the meteor. First, however, you need to find out who's playing Sburb in your neighborhood.

[BenBen]

Check whihc house the meteor is aimed at, that should tell you who caused it.

[snuffysam]

>Check which house the meteor is aimed at, that should tell you who caused it.

By triangulating the viewpoints from each video source, you determine that the house the meteor is aimed at is...
Well, you can't say that you're surprised.
Well, you could say it, but you'd be lying.
You know his house is going to dissapear into the medium soon, and you need a way off this planet so the meteors won't hit you. And to top it all off, an odd beeping noise is coming from your computer.
What do you do?

[FIDUSPAWN]

>Check to see why your computer is making a bleeping noise.

[snuffysam]

>Check to see why your computer is making a bleeping noise.

You have four applications on your Dock, any one of which could be making the noise!
First you have Quest of Minestar, which is surely the most important appication that could be on any computer.
Next you have iChum. Any other IM applications run slow on your computer, but iChum has always run fast.
Third you have SpyCam Delux, which enables you to access 19 out of your twenty spy cameras and switch between their views freely.
Last you have Apollo, an intuitive web browsing program.

What will you do?

[FIDUSPAWN]

>Check the iChum first.

[BenBen]

Open iChum, and yell at whoever is trying to contact you.

[snuffysam]

>Check the iChum first.
And, even though I only saw this after I was almost done posting:>Open iChum, and yell at whoever is trying to contact you.

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smallMacs has begun a conversation.
smallMacs:heLlo!
electroBond:Oh, not this again.
smallMacs:Wh@?!
electroBond:It's this stupid l337 business...
electroBond:Why can't you just type like a normal person?
smallMacs:7h12 12 n0RMaL!
smallMacs: pHoR meH, 4Nyw4Y
electroBond:It most certainly is not normal!
electroBond:You're not supposed to use numbers and sybols as abbreviations of certain letter groups!
electroBond:You don't have to have perfect grammer, but please don't mess with your spelling!
smallMacs:8u7 1'M u53D 70 7Yp1n' 7h12 W4y!
smallMacs:4ND we 4ll H4vE OUr kW1Rx, Do'n7 We?
electroBond:I do not have quirks.
smallMacs:y35 U d0!
smallMacs:Y0U'r3 4LW4Y5 f0rC1n' m3H T0 5w1tch T0 th15 5tUP1D Pr09R4m wH3n3V3r 1 N33D t0 K0nT4Ct Y0U!
electroBond:This program isn't stupid; it's the only one that will run fast enough on my computer!
smallMacs:8UlL5H17. BA H4Z 7h3 54M3 0p3r471n9 5Y573m 4z U 4nD p3573RchUm 4lW4Yz w0RkZ F1n3 f0r H1m.
electroBond:PesterChum is slow on his computer, he just doesn't notice it.
electroBond:When you recieve messages on PesterChum, when do they arrive: before they are sent, immediately after they are sent, or just plain after they are sent?
smallMacs:1 Dunn0. 1mm3D1473lY, 1 9u355, bU7 50M371m32 4F73Rw4RD2 1f 73H K0nn3c710N'2 5l0W.
electroBond:See? It's extremely slow, even on your computer!
smallMacs:...
smallMacs:4Nyw4Y, 1 W4nt3d tO 45k JoO 5om3TH1n'
electroBond:What is it?
smallMacs:c4N U Be MY 5erVEr pL4Yer pH0R 5bURB? ple45E?
electroBond:No.
electroBond:I accidently flushed my copy down the toilet.
smallMacs:OH.
electroBond:Whoopsie splashy.
smallMacs:WH@?
electroBond:Nothing.
smallMacs:...
smallMacs:d0'n7 w0rRy, i7'LL 7uRn up 3v3n7U4LLY. i7 4Lw4Y2 d032
electroBond:Huh?
smallMacs:i 7HinK i7'Z 7iM3 7r4v3L 0R 50M37hIN'.
smallMacs:A d09 5t0l3 MIN3 thi5 M0RNIN', aND a K0Py KAm3 0Ut 0F My 5Ink A Ph3w H0uR5 A90
smallMacs:1T 5MELlEd H0RR18Le, L1Ke 1t h4D 8EEn 1N 50mE0ne'5 t01let
electroBond:Anyway, I have more important things to take care of.
smallMacs:SPY1N' 0N J00r N319hb0R?
electroBond:He's up to something really suspicious! I swear it this time!
electroBond:Anyway, that's not exactly what I'm doing.
electroBond:I also have to figure out a way to attach my house to his, or something like that.
smallMacs:...?
smallMacs:74LK 70 J00 l473r 7h3N.
electroBond:Bye.

[BenBen]

SmallMacs's copy is obviously the one that Edward flushed down his toilet.

Edward: Have a dog arrive on your doorstep holding a copy of Sburb.